Allegiant from Black and White
by bballbabe1010
Summary: This story is written after Allegiant. Tori is alive. Tobias is constantly thinking about Tris. He can't stop imagining what his life could have been like if Tris was still alive. Tobias feels like she's still with him, but he knows it's only a delusion... or is it?
1. Chapter 1

_**Tobias**_

It's been three years. Three entire years since her death. It has been a half of a year since I spread her ashes while flying through the sky with my body strapped into the zip line's halter. It has also been three years since Uriah had been unplugged. Zeke has been completely torturing himself, for the past two years. His eyes had a look of pure anguish. But now, he seems to have gotten better than before, with Shauna helping him. But I don't know how. I will never ever be the same since she has died. Zeke still misses him but Uriah's death doesn't rule his life, like Tris's as changed mine.

 _I suppose a fire that burns bright isn't meant to last…._

She has been gone for those three entire years, the fire in her eyes is diminished. I haven't forgotten her though. Her blue-grey piercing orbs are still able to find their way into my mind. Every single second of every single day, the grief stays the same. It constantly pushes me to feel the agony more and more. I miss the way Tris's small, warm, and strong hand could fit into mine perfectly, like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

Her bright eyes were so insistent, so strong, that they seemed to hold as much power as a brewing storm.

I have tried to accept that she is really gone, that the warmth isn't capable of radiating off her petite body anymore, but I can't. How do you let go of someone you love?

You don't.

It's impossible for me to forget her. I never will. I'm sure someday that the memory of her will start to fade, but I know that won't be for a long time. I love her. I love Beatrice Prior with every single part of my being. And I don't think I'll ever stop.

"Four?" I blink myself back to reality as Zeke waves his hand back and forth in front of my face." Are you okay?"

"Yeah." I mumble my response towards Zeke.

We have grown a closer relationship in the past few years, because we both know what it's like to lose somebody that we love. Zeke had told me that he doesn't blame me for what happened to Uriah. But I would.

"So as I was saying before you rudely zoned out," he interrupted his own sentence with a light chuckle," would you like to go with Shauna and I to the tattoo parlor?"

I had moved back to the dauntless compound with many other people after a little time in my new apartment. It just didn't feel right there, without her with me. Here, there are at least memories that I will never forget.

"Okay, that sounds good." I replied half-heartedly.

In about 10 minutes, we arrived at the parlor to see Shauna walking around examining her options of what too get. Shauna was finally able to fully do what she could with regular legs. The mechanic legs she got have really benefited her. She has seemed to have a lifted spirit ever since she had received them.

"What are you gonna get?" Shauna asked, directing the question towards Zeke.

"Ummm, I'm not really sure yet." He answered.

"Four?" She questioned facing me.

"I don't know." Something for Tris.

Bud walks towards us with Tori at his side.

"Hey, what can we help you with?" Bud asks us with a light smile.

"We're gonna get a few tattoos." Zeke responds.

"Okay. Tori, I'll take Zeke and Shauna, you good with Four?" Bud questions.

"Yeah. C'mon Four." Tori mumbles. She hasn't smiled in a long time. Ever since Tris's death actually. I guess Tris had a bigger effect on people then she had presumed.

We entered the back room and Tori walked over towards me with her materials clutched in both hands.

"So, what will it be?" Tori inquired.

"I was kind of thinking that I could get something like a fire. It could be engulfing two hands in flames as a bird flies from the hands…. A raven." I responded quietly.

This ink mark represents everything that I could possibly fit into my mind. The fire is the bravery and courage that Tris had overflown inside her little frame. The two hands were meant to represent the selflessness she occupied, even though she couldn't even realize it. And the raven. The raven represented the same thing as the tattoo that marked Tris's collarbone. Family. But this raven, it was different also. There was only one person who I will ever consider family. Only one single being that was closer to me than my own blood relatives. The only one person that was my family, my real, true family, is Tris. And it always will be Tris. She was and will be my permanent family, like this tattoo is permanently placed on my flesh. Having the raven fly out of the hands represents how Tris is uncontainable and uncontrollable. Her power was too strong for anybody to counter and she was insistent.

"Where would you like it, Four?" Tori asks me.

"Right here." I answer placing my finger right to my chest, where my heart is located.

"Okay." She mumbles as she starts working.

A few minutes of silence pass, which I am gladly capable of allowing to happen.

"Do you miss her?" Tori asks softly, almost as if she says it too loud, it may break me. But that doesn't matter, because I am already broken. I am a broken coward. Tris would admit to that. I tried to take the memory serum, so I could forget how cold and brittle her body was, after she was shot. And that was cowardice. She would hate you because of that. My mind hisses at me. And she would. She hated cowards. Peter was a coward. And now, I am too.

I suddenly find myself giving Tori an answer.

"Yes." Is all I'm able to wheeze out. It's like hell without her. No. It's not "like" hell, it is hell.

"Me too." She says to me.

"Yeah."

"You loved her." Tori mutters," Everyone knew. She changed you a lot, you know?"

"I still do." I state.

"And she obviously loved you too."

"Yeah." A light smile crosses my face. The first time I smiled since-

"I miss her." She whispers, her voice slightly cracking. I've never seen her like this. Tori has always been strong. She is different right now. Almost vulnerable.

"I do too." I reply gently.

"Okay," She stands and composes herself," Your tattoo is done. Have fun Four."

That is the most I have ever talked about Tris with anyone. Well except for one time with Christina.

Tori exits the room after placing a bandage over the new mark lying across my chest. I slide off the seat I was in and exit, walking into the front room. Zeke and Shauna are already there waiting for me.

"Hey." Zeke calls to me while waving.

"Hey." I say.

"So what did you get?" He asks.

"A tattoo." I reply sarcastically and Zeke chuckles.

He and Shauna start talking and I just zone out. Tris. She is the only thing that comes to mind. The sad thing is, even though I know for a fact that she is gone, I just sometimes have this feeling that she is still smiling. That her heart is beating lightly throughout her body. That her cheeks are still slightly flushed. That her body is still filled with warmth. That she is still alive.

But the thought of that, of her being alive, is just filling me with false hope. She did survive the death serum… a gunshot should be survivable then too. My mind thinks. She's strong enough. She could. She could survive. I shake my head, trying to stop from thinking about this. But she didn't. I saw her dead. My brain counters. It seems like I am having an argument with myself. I shake my head once more and stare straight ahead, ignoring my thoughts.

5 minutes later, we arrive in the cafeteria. Going in line to get food, I notice Christina stand up and start walking towards us.

"Hey." Her voice echoes through the café.

"Hi Chris!" Shauna replies.

"Hey. Four, how are you?" She asks.

"Fine." I reply.

I place a hamburger onto the plate that is held between both of my hands.

Her small petite fingers come to mind as I look at my own. Her blonde hair, her slim but strong arms, her muscled body, and her eyes. Her eyes. The blue-grey color always affected me. They were piercing.

"So Four?" Christina stopped talking after say that.

"What?" I glared.

"I have something to tell you." She says timidly looking away.

I just look at her and wait to hear what she needs to say.

"I know you won't be happy, okay? Just listen." She starts," Okay so you remember Lauren?"

I nod in response. Of course I do, she was the other trainer that I worked with.

"Well, I saw her yesterday. She came back to the compound recently and she and I talked for a little bit about life and she asked how you were."

"So?" I mumble, this is completely worthless.

"So? I figured out something. She likes you, Four." She states. Straight forward as always. Such a candor.

"Like a lot. So I might've accidentally… set you up with her… on a date... tomorrow." Christina isn't looking into my eyes. She avoids them so stubbornly that it seems like she feels that if she does look up, they will burn her to ashes.

…What?

My head is throbbing. It feels like it has its own heartbeat.

BANG!

My fist finds its way to the surface of the table and Christina's body flies up in the air.

"Calm down Four! You have been completely closed off from everyone since-"

"No."

"Please try, please."

"No!" I shout.

"That's it Four!" Christina starts to shout at me.

My black boots are slammed to the ground as I start to walk away. She of all people, cannot tell me who I will or will not date!

Christina darts up after me yelling my name. I do not feel like dealing with her.

"Are you kidding me?! Get back here!" She screams at me as she starts to match my pace.

"Go. Away." I say deadly quiet.

"You know what Four? I am NOT going anywhere just because you don't like what you're hearing! You ARE going to go out with Lauren once, just once if you hate it that much, but you WILL go with her!"

Squeezing my fists with fury, I glare at her.

"The day I let a candor tell me what to do, is the day I die." I growl so lowly it's barely audible.

Her eyes slowly close as she tightens her mouth to a straight line. "Tris would hate you." She whispers.

"You know nothing about her! You wouldn't know who she would hate!" Anger bubbles up through me.

"You are despicable! Yes, I wasn't her boyfriend, and I know I wasn't as close to her as you were, but let me tell you one thing Four. I was her best friend." Christina paused, "I know for a fact that Tris hated cowards. And you, Four, have become a coward! You are the worst coward I have ever met, you might even be equal to Peter!" I scoff at her remark but she continues anyway," You know why? YOU are supposed to be a leader. YOU are supposed to be a friend to these people. YOU are supposed to be the dauntless prodigy! But all you do, all you do is sit there and glare at these people that you are supposed to care for. You don't even talk to half the people you used to consider friends! I love Tris. She was my closest friend, Four, but she would have wanted you to move on, because she would understand. And she would want you to at least try. She would want you to be happy. Please try Four, please?" Christina's voice noticeably softened by the end of her "lecture".

"I am not going on a date with anyone" Is all I say to her.

"Four, she loved you, you loved her. You two were unstoppable. But now, it's over. And you need to accept that, I swear it gets easier when you do. Please, think about Tris. What would she tell you to do right now?"

My mind flashes to Beatrice Priors vibrant eyes as she squeezes the trigger of a gun for the first time. I picture her hands flying around as we experienced our first argument. What would she say?

 _Tobias._ I picture words forming at her mouth as she speaks. _I love you, Tobias_.

My mouth forms a small smile as I think about her saying that. _But, you need to move on. I can't cause you anymore pain then I already have. I love you, but please try for me._

Then I picture her dead figure on the cold floor, blood seeping through holes that were pierced into her body. David placed across her with his gun shaking in between both hands. I visibly grimace at that and only manage a one word response to Christina.

"Okay." I say so quietly that she has to lean close to hear me.

"What?" She asks, slightly confused.

"I'll do it." I say louder this time, so she can hear.

A slight smile finds a way to her face. "Thank you. Meet me in the pit at 5 o'clock." She responds with a full grin growing on her face.

"Okay." Is the only word I say before I turn around and rush away.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Tobias**_

I walk towards the pit, taking a quick glance at my watch _4:55_. My pace slows as I realize where I'm going, to meet Lauren.

A strange feeling bubbles up inside my stomach, pushing itself up into my chest.

I hadn't dealt with it much, but I have before.

 _Guilt._

Why would I be guilty? I didn't exactly choose to go on a date with Lauren, but then again, I could've avoided it.

My feet spot as I stand in the exact place Christina told me to wait at.

I shouldn't have come. I should've stayed home. The guilt still doesn't subside. It's not like Tris is here anyway. She could've chosen to let Caleb go, to stay back and let it all unfold, but she didn't. A small part of my body aches as I think about her. After three years, she still has an effect on me. And I don't think it'll stop.

A loud clicking noise echoes around the area and interrupts my thoughts. I raise my eyes from the ground and look to where it's coming from.

Click click

I stood there and watched as Christina walked towards me with a woman holding a small smile on her face. Lauren. Her body swayed as she walked forward, hips waving back and forth in a small line. She was wearing 6 inch heels. Stilettos, was once explained to me, looked like these. They also had small silver spikes dotting them. Her dress was black like her shoes. It was tight, hugging every curve of hers, and the neckline plunged down a lot deeper than it should be. She looks nothing like Tris.

"Four!" Christina shouted waving her arm in the air, "C'mere."

I walked towards them, my face completely straight. I hope it won't be long.

"Hey Four." Lauren flashes a smile at me.

"Hi." I respond, still keeping my lips in a line.

"Ready?" Christina asks," I have the perfect place for you guys."

Christina starts walking forward with Lauren on her side. I trail behind.

A few minutes after, we arrive at a small sized room. It was dimly light and had a small table standing near a line of curtain covered windows. The table had a light table cloth with a vase holding half a dozen of delicate, white roses. Next to the table sat a large picnic basket which would most likely be holding our dinner. The walls were a deep red color, almost black. It had candles placed everywhere, set from the table to the near walls. I'm surprised that there are windows. We must be pretty high up if there are windows, meaning that we aren't underground anymore.

Christina lightly waves her hand in front of the room, as if she's presenting a grand award.

"Well, here you go. Have fun." She exclaims and then walks away, leaving me with only Lauren.

I stand there awkwardly, really not wanting to even make an effort to fake that I want to be with her, because I don't.

I miss Tris so much.

"Sooo…" Lauren says awkwardly," How have you been…?"

"Fine." I respond with the most intimidating voice possible. If I have to do this, then I don't have to enjoy it, and neither does she.

"Okay." She moves to the table and pulls out her own chair, sitting down stiffly.

"Come sit down, Four" She waves her hand towards the table.

I slowly and regretfully walk towards the table and pull out my chair, also sitting stiffly.

"Do you like your new job?" She questions, trying to make small talk.

"Yes" I respond using my "instructor" voice as some people used to say. Tris told me about that voice. She told me about the way I can switch faces so quickly. Thinking of that reminds me of her fiery eyes. Piercing is the first word that comes to mind when I think of her eyes. They were a mix of grey and blue. The perfect amount of each. I place my hand on my jaw and rub it while my elbow is on the table.

"C'mon Four, I know you aren't like this, don't be so stiff." She says almost sympathetically.

"Stiff? Look in the mirror lately? I'm not the only stiff one." I remark.

"Seriously? Calm down, okay? Why don't we at least try to enjoy this?" Lauren asks, trying to reason with me.

"Okay." I respond.

After that, we start making small talk again. Like about our jobs, how we've been, and things like that.

"Do you miss the factions?" Lauren questions with a serious look setting over her face.

"Honestly, I miss them more than I thought I would."

"And why is that?" She inquires.

"Well, they have memories. Some aren't the greatest, but others, like dauntless, hold many things I never want to forget." I say, thinking of Tris," I think that I wouldn't have missed them as much as I would if some of the people we lost were still here, but I guess this is what I have. But I'm glad they're gone too."

"Oh yeah, how have you been lately, with her gone?"

I immediately knew she meant Tris, and hearing someone mention her sent a twinge of pain throughout me. I miss her. I can barely stand to live without her, it hurt more than any pain I've ever dealt with.

"I have been getting better at dealing with her being gone, I guess. But don't get me wrong, I miss her like crazy." I mumble, afraid that if I talk any louder, my voice will start to tremble.

Lauren nodded her head.

"She was a good person, brave." Lauren stated.

I nodded my head solemnly. Taking the last bite of my food, I stood and gave a very small smile to Lauren.

"I had a good time, but I think staying friends would be for the best." I alleged to her.

"Of course," She replied, also standing" I had fun."

I moved my head and gestured to the door.

"Ready to go back?"

"Yes."

We stepped out the door and followed the hall that Christina had lead us through.

Soon enough, we arrived near her apartment.

"Thank you for tonight." She smiled.

"Yeah, have a good night." I said.

"Goodbye Four." She stepped towards me, encasing me in a hug and I wasn't sure how to respond. She pulled back and lightly placed a kiss on my cheek.

I could tell by the way she looked that it wasn't meant to be romantic, only because of the way she looked at me afterward: with sympathy.

"I hope it gets better, that _you_ start to get better." She whispered.

"Thank you." I said awkwardly. I hate sympathy, but at least she wasn't trying to force a relationship on me. I lightly smiled at her as she stepped into her apartment.

"Goodbye." She waved.

"Bye." I waved back.

I started to walk off towards my apartment when I saw Christina standing there.

"It went well?" She asked while walking up to me.

"Sure." I stated shortly.

"OHHHHH FOURRRRRR! I SAW IT! YOU GUYS KISSEDDDDD!" She screamed.

I swear she has never heard the definition of quiet. I have no idea how Tris was able to deal with her sometimes.

"Shut. Up. We, in fact, agreed on being friends." I said angrily.

"Okayyyy" She winked," So when's your next date?"

My fists started to turn white because of how hard I was gripping them.

"We. Are. Not. Together." I growled almost silently.

She just looked back at me, trying to glare me down, even though I could see small flares of fear that were exposed through her eyes. I spun on my heel and rushed around the corner trying to make my way to my apartment. My shoes slammed against the ground and I turned and threw my fist against the wall with a loud grunt. Turning back on my way, I walked forward throwing my feet rapidly in front of another, moving quick walking pace. I almost didn't notice when a small body dressed in all black flew into me. The person let out a small whimper but I honestly was too angry to care. I continued on without looking back.

I flew around the next corner and arrived at my apartment throwing open the door. I ripped off the black t-shirt I had been wearing and threw it on the ground as I found a pair of baggy shorts and another t-shirt. I decided against the dark shirt and slid on the loose black and grey shorts. I flung myself onto my bed and reached over my dresser to turn off the lamp is set on top of it.

I don't remember turning that light on…. I thought as I scratched the back of my neck. When I pulled back to lay down, I noticed a white blur on the table beside my bed. Looking over, I realized it was a piece of paper. I reached out and pulled it off the desk. It said:

 **Tobias,**

 **Meet me at the net, 11:30 pm tomorrow night.**

I placed it back on my desk. Questions swirled through my head and I stared blankly towards the wall.

 _How did they manage to get inside my house? How do they know my name? Why do they want me to meet them? Why couldn't they just approach me in person?_

 _Who wrote this?_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Tris**_

 _2 years before_

I hear voices, soft voices that reach a level no higher than a whisper, that seem to be coming from somewhere near me. Darkness surrounds me in this place. It feels like it is completely engulfing my body. A splitting pain explodes throughout my head. What is wrong with me? My hands are laid flat out next to me, my arms and legs both feel cold. I can tell that my body is resting upon a flat, hard surface.

I feel a twinge of energy at the tips of my fingers, almost like my hands just had stopped being numb and are now getting feedback. The whispers that I heard earlier grow to a loud hum and I try to focus in on what they are saying. I hear the words "gun", "serum", "Tris", and the voices quietly decline as one speaks the word "Divergent". The last word seems to have a special meaning by the way they pronounce it. It seems almost dangerous. I perceive a few more mumbles before a shooting agony attacks my head, sending a terrible ache through me.

I try to subside the pain by slightly tilting my head to the side, but it only increases from the movement.

"Ahhh…" I hear a noise almost like a groan escape from my mouth.

"Hello Tris, I was wondering when you would wake up." A male voice speaks. It is recognizable.

 _Tris? Tris. Why does that seem so familiar? Who or what is Tris? I need to find out._

With all the strength I contain in my body, I push my eyes open. From the outside of my eyelids, a bright light pushes into my pupils which forces me to squint.

Before me sits an older looking man inside a wheelchair with another next to him, the second has brunette curly hair with streaks of grey incased inside. Around them are white brick walls with cabinets and tables scattered around the rooms. Each table has something different. Some have, what I believe are, microscopes set out on two of the tables lining the walls. On other desks, there are thin, black things with a bright screen reflecting lights and a keyboard on the lower half. Computer, I remind myself, it's called a computer.

"How was your rest?" The older man in the wheelchair asks with a smirk appearing on his face.

"W-where am I?" My voice croaks. I'm struggling to speak.

"Well my dear Tris, we are in the Bureau of Genetic Welfare, of course." The man speaks.

 _I'm Tris?_ I'm Tris.

A voice echoes inside my head. It's deep, saying my name repetitively. With the name appears an image. The image displays two blue eyes. They aren't like just any blue eyes though, they are dark, so dark that they are almost black. They are like an ocean that's so deep that you cannot see the bottom.

"Wh-who are y-you?" I ask the man.

He chuckles in response.

"You don't remember me?" He asks.

"Am I supposed to?" My voice begins to grow stronger as I grow more accustomed to speaking.

"Well, I think you would be able to remember me as David." He says.

I rack my mind for the name. For anything that I know about this man. I know him. I think. How can I not remember him?

"Hm?" I mumble like a question.

"You worked with me." He says like it's the simplest thing in the entire world.

"Where?" I inquire.

"In the bureau of genetic welfare, which is right here." He answers.

"And what did we work as?" I continue to question him, trying to remember anything.

"You worked alongside me as I would research genetically pure humans. I had told you before how important you were to my experiments, and I will only repeat it once more. You are somebody with pure genes but your genes react highly improbably to serums and such. In fact, I'm sure that I've never seen someone with such genes so we had you tested. In your city, you were considered divergent."

"What is a divergent?" I asked.

"The divergent were people with the results of more than one faction. In this case, you had the results of three factions, Abnegation, Erudite, and Dauntless. Abnegation was a faction devoted to selflessness, Erudite was devoted to education, and Dauntless was devoted to bravery." He paused. "Your results were so different from all the others. All the additional divergents had the results of only two factions. You have three results. So we tested you and Four because his results were equally as unique. You see, Four had the results of an Abnegation but responded to stimulations as any divergent would. He is considered a genetically damaged person because of his test results. You, on the other hand, are the strongest genetically pure person I have ever met." He informed me.

I took a moment to think over everything the man, David, had said. The word Divergent again seemed to stick out to me. Why does it seem so important? I then thought about a name that made my pulse quicken at the mention of it. Four. The deep blue eyes that had before haunted my mind returned into my head. Then a face formed in my imagination. A full lower lip and spare upper appeared with a hooked nose beneath the deep blue eyes. The man had cropped brown hair and a slight scar near his chin. Tobias. My mind told me. Memories flooded back as I thought about what happened in my life, including my parents Caleb, Tobias, Christina, Will, and so much more. They ended with my last night before my mission. I remember what was planned. Caleb was supposed to go to the weapons room and release the memory serum, but I went instead. I survived the death serum came into the room, only to be met by David, facing me with a gun. I remember managing to release it but then hearing a gun go off. Then, my last memory is of being pulled into my mother's warm embrace. David shot me. He. Shot. Me.

"Where is Tobias, David?" I spat his name like venom.

"Ah, you remember. Well Tobias is in Chicago. He had originally moved into an apartment but recently returned to the dauntless compound to join your friends." He answered calmly.

Tobias wouldn't leave me.

"Did you force him out? Does he know where I am?" I ask angrily.

"No, I did not force him out. Tobias left this compound by choice." His response was dry and dull.

"And where was I through all this? Why didn't I know about this?"

"Beatrice, this is a very complicated situation."

"Tell me." I demand.

"Tris…"

"David, tell me!" A harsh tone cuts into my voice.

"Okay…" Davis hesitates and scopes the room before turning back over to me to continue," Tris, I shot you. Three times, actually. Your heart stopped beating for eighteen hours after I shot the last bullet. Your friend, Cara, soon found out. Tobias and Christina were then told the news from Cara as soon as they arrived home. Later on, your heart suddenly started to beat very slightly. It was almost impossible to find the rhythm of your heart beat unless the person looking for the pulse had experience with medical emergencies, which in this case, my nurses did. You still hadn't awoken, but your heart was beating enough to give us, at minimum, a morsel of confidence in your recovery. Beatrice, you had a 4.6% chance of surviving the coma you were in. Why give somebody false hope if there is less than a five percent chance of recovery? Because of this, a few others and I decided not to tell your friends; it was better to spare them any more pain. Months later, we gave you a serum called the revival serum since you were at such a low chance of recovering at all. We tested this serum on many people in the hope to bring each subject back. You, Tris, are the only one to ever respond positively to the revival serum. And I plan to find out what was different about your reaction compared to the other participants."

"Since when have you been somebody who cares about others experiencing pain?" I growled, staring him straight in the eye," And what are you going to do, test me like Jeanine and her lab rats?"

"I'm not Jeanine, Beatrice. This isn't some petty little experiment to ease my curiosity. This," David pauses and makes a hand gesture that seems to present the room we are in as something grand," could change the world and how we look at everything. It could be extremely valuable if my group and I understand how to use this serum correctly. So, it would make everything easier if you cooperate with the experiments we will perform on you. Your cooperation may save the world one day.

"What kind of testing?" I ask grimly.

"We will be examining your internal organs. We will also be sending you into serums to see how you react and if any of these reactions have any reason to why you are responding so well to this revival serum." David tells me this with a smirk.

"So I am like one of Jeanine's lab rats is what you're telling me." My hand tingles with an urge to slap David across the face, hard.

"Beatrice, I already explain-"

"No. This is just your way of denying it. You're just expanding what you say to make it sound like I won't be tested like a freaking guinea pig. But you are just doing the same as Jeanine, or at least you'll try to. " I interrupt.

The moment I finish speaking, the glass door to the lab slides open and presents a man that I assume is a guard.

"Sir," He speaks," It's ready."


	4. Chapter 4

_**Tobias**_

 _Beep beep beep, beep beep beep._ My alarm blares blinking the numbers 5:30 in red. I groan and roll over the side of my bed. My body gradually starts to awaken and I change into athletic clothing.

I make my way down the halls that lead to the training room and set up a punching bag, a few knives, and a single gun. I walk over to the targets and bring the gun with me to do shooting first. Breathe in, breathe out, release. I repeat these words in my brain every time I send a bullet to the center of the target. I continue to shoot until the cartridge is out of bullets. I then move on to throwing knives and hit where I aim every throw. I start to remove the knives from where they are wedged.

My mind replays to years ago where a young, blonde, abnegation stood before this target.

I shake my head quickly in attempt to get her out of my mind.

Last is the punching bags.

I walk over to the bags and hit the leather with all the energy I have contained inside my body. Each punch has meaning. Each takes out the anger I hold toward many people. My strongest are designated to the people I hate most _. Thwack. Marcus. Thwack. Eric. Thwack. Caleb. THWACK._ The bag falls from the chain onto the floor from my last hit _. David._

I bend down and pick up the bag. I set it back up and stand completely motionless in front of the bag as a memory flashes into my mind:

 _My body is still behind the small, petite frame of the blonde that seems to be constantly attracting my attention._

 _I start to speak to her with my arms crossed over my chest._

" _You're weak. You have no muscle." My voice rumbles out deeply._

 _She continues to punch the bag with the same approach, completely ignoring me._

" _You're never going to win, not like that." I speak to her again._

" _That's good to know." Her voice responds sarcastically._

" _Yeah, you're gonna have to use your whole body." I tell her._

 _She starts to punch again._

 _Then I reach my hand out and place it on her abdomen saying, "Keep tension here."_

 _A spark runs through my hand and she turns to look at me._

" _Okay…" She whispers._

My mind returns to the present, where I am as still as a statue inside a training room, in front of the punching bag.

I look at my watch and realize I've been in this room for over 2 hours. I leave the room in a hurry to eat breakfast. I head to the cafeteria and grab 2 pieces of toast and sit down to start to devour them.

 _ **15 hours later**_

I wake up again to my alarm, but this time the numbers displayed on the clock are 11:00. I turn over and go into the bathroom and turn on the shower. After stepping into the glass enclosure, soft, warm droplets flow down my body and leave my mind to roam free.

I start to think about the note. My plan is to meet whoever it is there, but to scope it out from above before to see if I would even want to meet the person, or if it's some kind of setup.

Who could it possibly be? I begin to make a list of people who could have possibly left the note… then take into consideration the handwriting and the fact that they used my name. I try to analyze everything and the handwriting was a little sloppy or else rushed so I believe it could be either male or female, but I'm definitely leaning towards female because dauntless isn't the faction that was based on education.

 _But this note could be from anyone._

I narrow my list down to females who could have written the note:

• Lauren

• Christina

• Shauna

• Lynn

• Evelynn

In the back of my mind Tris's name lingers… but I must be crazy if I believed she was alive, I saw her dead. But I guess I can't help but hope.

I immediately shut down the thought of Tris ever being alive. No point in giving myself false hope.

After five more minutes of cleaning myself, I climb out of the bathroom, pull on a black outfit, and run a hand through my hair.

I walk out of my apartment, double checking that I locked the door, and head down the pathway towards the net.

My hand subconsciously reaches down to the waistband of my black pants to feel for the pistol hidden within the cloth as I get closer to the net.

When I come near the net, I slide my body against the wall and turn my head around the concrete wall and peer into the area. Completely empty. A setup?

I wait with my back to the wall for many more minutes, trying to scout out the area for any sign of danger. Finally, I can't take the waiting anymore. I pull out my pistol and hold it out in front of me and walk out into the open.

"Hello?" I call out.

 _Wow… good job on not making yourself noticeable_ I think to myself.

I constantly check around the area, my head flying back and forth, looking for something.

I call out once more and double check behind me. Nothing. I walk out and head back to my apartment where I sit there and grow more confused until the thoughts finally lull me to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Tris**_

 _A month before present time_

Footsteps. Loud, echoing footsteps. I sit up in a hard, wooden cot with one uncomfortable blanket and push it off my body. I pull my hand through my knotted hair. It has grown down to my shoulders.

The footsteps grow louder. They are all in synch. Each stomp echoed like thunder in the sky. As they grew to the point where I could no longer take the noise, my cell door slid open. I knew what was coming. It happened every two days a week.

Testing. David called it "Investigating for the good of humanity" but that was just a way to make it sound better.

They have been doing this to me for an impossibly long amount of time. I cannot remember how long I have been in here.

Possibly months, years. It feels like decades.

From behind my cell doors enters the same five guards that come every time they experiment on me. All buff with cropped hair and each seems to be at least six foot. They definitely don't want to take any chances.

"Tris, time to go." One called to me taking me from my thoughts.

I grunt in response and try as casually as possible to check my waistband for the weapon I stole just three days before. I felt the trigger and knew today was the day. I was getting out of here.

I walked up to the door and two guards placed their hands on each of my arms. They escorted me out of my room with one in front me, two behind, and two on either side of me-both still holding my arms.

We walked towards the lab. Right, right, left, left, left, right, right.

I had memorized this route for the day I escape. Today, I reminded myself.

As we turned into the first left, I saw the door I needed to get to so I could leave the building.

The hall was completely empty. But there are guards just around the corner. I have to make this fast.

I spun my body so the two men holding onto me were forced to release my arms. All of them weren't expecting this because of how the walk had practically turned into a weekly routine.

I elbowed the one to my right in the chest and kneed the other in the groin, making them both pause from the surprise and pain. I quickly pulled out the gun from my waistband and shot at the man ahead of me, straight through the head. The two men behind me had their weapons raised, ready to fire. The other two men at my sides were trying to regain power over me.

I fought back and no shots were fired. I knew they couldn't shoot me unless they absolutely needed to. I was important to these experiments and possibly the strongest genetically pure person they may ever find.

I punched the man to my left in the temple and turned his body to kick him right underneath his ribs. The other man attacked me from behind and held me in a choke hold. Faster, others will be coming. I detached myself from his grip and shot at his head. The other two men moved towards me and one ran at me, ready to attack me. Just as he made contact with my body, I quickly skimmed over his shoulder to see the other with his finger placed on the trigger. Everything seemed to go into slow motion. His hand slowly started to squeeze the trigger. I turned the man, who was grabbing at me, towards the gun. He just got a punch in. _Pow._ The shot meant for me echoed throughout the entire hall and hit the guard in the back. I turned and fired two bullets at the other guard without hesitation. I knew that there were going to be guards about ten feet away from me in 30 seconds. I sprinted to the only door in this hall and grabbed on the handle and pulled. It didn't budge.

 _No no no no no!_ I grabbed my gun and shot at the lock three times. I pulled again. It won't open! I placed both palms against the knob and one foot on the wall holding the door. _I'm letting my guard down. This isn't good._ The door opened after a hard pull and I rushed through just as I heard a gunshot erupt in the room.

My boots squeaked as I turned the corner. _Left, right, right._ Three more and I'm free. I turned at full sprint until I saw the exit. Almost there.

But, of course, it's never that easy.

In front of me stood 2 men with a gun in hand. The door was right behind them. I ran full speed and dove. Everything slowed down yet again as I made contact with a guard. Bam…

I screamed.

A searing pain went through my left shoulder.

I punched the man I previously dove on, adrenaline coursing through me.

He went limp under me and the guard behind me shot again.

I was numb.

I turned and kicked at his feet, knocking him to the ground and pulled out my gun and shot.

They were done. I quickly pushed past one dead body and the other unconscious. I grabbed the door handles and to my relief they opened with no struggle.

I jogged outside and my boots hit the ground with a squeak. The sky was dark. It wasn't night yet, possibly a little past six judging the clouds. The area around me was a white landscape. Everything was covered in snow, something I hadn't seen much, something I hadn't seen since Tobias.

Small snowflakes were flush against the grey sky. The ground was set with a light layer of snow laying atop it.

Grass was peeking out of some areas, but it was mostly dead.

I stood in the exact same spot for a little while, examining the scenery. I hadn't seen anything outdoors for a long time.

But when I heard a bang from inside the building, I knew I had to get on my way. I pushed off the ground, almost slipping from such a powerful start, and raced away from the building.

I was finally escaping. Finally.

I don't know how long I had been running, maybe ten minutes, maybe twenty. All I know is that it must've been long enough.

With the snow growing heavier, I must've managed to escape the men. I heard and saw no sign of them anywhere. But, even though the snow had provided me a protection from the bureau, it had also caused me to become very cold. With goosebumps appearing all over my pale arms, I went forward, looking for some sign of life outside of the bureau.

I am going to find Chicago.

I am going to find Tobias.

I kept on walking until I saw something like a light through the snow. I hurried towards it, gun in hand, and once I got close enough to make out the object in the snow, I noticed it seemed to look like a truck the amity used for farming.

I ran towards it and moved in front of the moving vehicle. It kept on moving forward. It got closer, and closer, until suddenly it skidded to a stop. It had little traction with the snow so it slid forward a little bit.

A tall man stepped out. His body is thin and kind of scrawny. The man has dark hair with a few grey streaks just starting to show. He shows a bright smile against his dark skin.

"What's a pretty girl like you doing out in this storm?" He inquires with a slight slur in his words. He still has his perky smile shining through the snow.

"Actually, I'm on my way to Chicago. You wouldn't happen to be going there, would you?" I asked faking a smile the entire time.

"Yeah! I'm heading right near that area!" He answers with a chuckle," You want a ride?" He waves his hand towards the truck.

"If you wouldn't mind…"

"Of course I wouldn't mind!" He replies with a laugh.

"C'mon let's get in the truck before you freeze to death!"

He pushes my body in front of his figure, towards the truck. Once the doors slam shut he twists the key and revs the engine like a motorcycle. Then he pulls on through the snow and we start on our way to Chicago in silence.

When it seems like at least 20 minutes have passed, the man turns his head towards me.

"Ya know what I just realized?" He speaks without giving me a chance to respond, "I never caught your name."

"I'm Tris." I speak with a slight grin. His mood seems to easily rub off onto others. "What's your name?"

"I'm Kahlil!" He exclaims reaching his arm out to shake my hand. "It's nice to meet you, Tris."

While we are distracted with our greeting, Kahlil almost drives off the path. I hurriedly reach over and turn the car back onto the dirt way.

"You have some good reflexes." He says with a smirk.

"Yeah I guess I kinda do," I respond "they've developed faster over the past few years."

"Really? What have you been doing with your life, Tris?"

"Long story." I reply with a sigh.

"I always can make time for a story." He chuckles lightly.

"Eh..." I say while sucking air through my teeth, "How about you tell me how you got such an interesting name first."

"Okay. But you'll tell your story after, right?"

"Sure."

"I was born in Arabia, my friend. My parents actually adopted me. They'd been looking for a seemingly joyful baby at the time and I was just that. My adoptive parents told me that I always was laughing as a young child, which is where the name Kahlil came from. Kahlil means friend." He lets out a hearty laugh.

"Well I believe that name fits you very well."

"I would hope so." His smile broadens.

"I don't think there are many people that would disagree your name meaning friend."

"Good, good." He responded with his natural smile. "Now about that long story…"

I displayed a light grin and we drove on through the snow.

From what I could tell, at least three hours had passed. We still bumped along the road silently. Kahlil told me we were supposed to arrive soon. He said it would take about ten minutes.

The environment around us had changed to snowy fields and meadows. Up ahead of us was the fence. I recognized it. My heart beat started to increase in speed. When we got to be about 100 feet away, it was racing rapidly.

Thoughts surrounded my head. What if no one remembers me? What if no one cares about me anymore? What if Tobias moved on? Does he have a wife and children? Does he still have any feelings for me?

 _Is Tobias still alive?_

We entered the gate and Kahlil stopped the car. He pulled over and spoke with someone and they waved us on. He pulled out and started along the road.

"Where am I taking you, Tris?" He asked.

"You can stop here actually." I said pointing to the side of the road.

He pulled the car to the edge of the grass and looked at me questioningly.

"Are you sure?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah." I smiled. "Thank you for everything Kahlil. I hope to see you soon."

"Goodbye, Tris." He spoke with sincerity.

"Goodbye, Kahlil. Wish me luck!" I waved at him and he pulled back along the road and drove off.

I looked over to the railroad and waited for the train's arrival. I'm going home.

The train cam eventually. I hadn't gotten on to one of these in years. With a running start, I fell into stride with the second to last car. I jumped as best as possible, and grabbed the handle along the side.

My body was whipped back. The wind stung my face. I tried to maneuver myself into the train car, but the air current threw me back into the car.

In a split second, my head struck the metal with a clang. I could barely support myself anymore. It's too strong. My hand was starting to slip. Out of all the things, this is what was gonna kill me? I don't think so.

With all the energy I had left, I hurled my body into the car and hit the floor hard.

The floor was wooden. The walls, metal. It was just like I remembered it. I was pushed up against the wall tightly, as if my body was preventing itself from falling out of the car unexpectedly.

I prepared myself for a long ride. I'm not even close.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Tris**_

About forty minutes later, the dauntless compound started coming into sight. I stood up.

I pictured Christina standing with me. _On the count of three we'll jump. One, two…three!_ I pushed off the floor with all my might.

My knees scraped along the gravel. I chucked at the familiar memory and stood up. There in front of me was the entrance. My ticket to Tobias. I raced towards it at impeccable speed and didn't hesitate one second before jumping into darkness.

The net hit me like a brick wall. I laid, my body in an awkward position, and reminded myself of everything that happened here.

Voices echoed through the hall. They grew closer and closer. Time to go.

I flipped my hood up and hurried away from the net, away from the voices.

I don't know if I'll be ready to face anyone yet. I don't know how I'll present myself to them. I don't know how to tell them I'm alive.

I rushed to the first place my feet took me. The tattoo parlor.

The bell rang quietly when I stepped through the door. The parlor looked exactly like I remembered.

Footsteps started to come out from the back and I pulled my hood closer to my face.

"Hello, how can I help you?" Tori arrived with slightly grayed hair and a thin athletic body. She was aging a bit.

"Hi." I purposely whispered hoarsely so she couldn't recognize my voice. "I would like a tattoo."

"Okay, what do you have in mind?" I pointed to a picture of the three ravens, exactly like the ones on my collar bone.

We walked into the back room.

"You can sit here."

I walked over to the seat and reclined back into it.

"Where would you like it?" She asked.

"Actually, I decided I'd rather not have it." I spoke with my normal voice in hopes that she would recognize me.

Her body froze. She slowly turned over to me and looked at me skeptically. She shook her head. She can't see my face.

"Okay, would you like something else?" She looked disappointed.

"No, no. I just realized I had already gotten that design. I have enough tattoos already. Sorry for bothering you." I uttered.

She turned away from me, but right when I was about to walk out of the room she turned her body back around.

"I don't think I asked your name?" She questioned.

Took you long enough.

"Well, my real name is Beatrice, but my friends call me Tris." I announced.

Her body flinched. She whipped her head to look straight at my face, though it was still covered by the shadow of my black hood. I slowly removed it and let my long, light hair fall out from it. She looked at me with hurt and confusion filling her expression.

"…..Tri-is?" She stuttered.

I nodded my head with a slow smile growing on my face, a single tear also running down my cheek.

In a split second, Tori's tools were on the floor and her arms were tightly pulled to my body. Her body shook and she sobbed into my shoulder.

Following a few minutes of standing still in this position, Tori looked up to me with the largest smile I have ever seen on her face before.

I had no idea my "death" would affect her this much.

"If you aren't Tris, I will kill you." She looked into my eyes seriously.

I chuckled at this.

"I'm Tris, Tori."

She smiled and pulled me right back into a hug.

"I know."

Following the entire story of my "death", Tori offered to have me stay at her apartment. I agreed and she told me to wait for a moment as she got her supplies cleaned up. I put my hood back up and walked into the waiting room. I sat on a chair in the corner and waited a few minutes for Tori. She wasn't coming out it was taking longer than I expected.

"Tori!"

"Just give me a minute! I'm almost done."

I sat back down and waited until I finally hear her coming. I turned over and looked at her, but then I realized, it wasn't Tori. I ducked as low as possible. I didn't want to be noticed.

In front of me were my old friends. Zeke, Shauna, and Christina stood at the entrance.

"Tori!" They all yelled.

"Geez, clam down. I'm coming, ok Tr-"Tori stopped mid-sentence as she walked out to see the three. She turned her head to me quickly and looked back at them.

I made sure make my hood cast a shadow on my face.

"What was that, Tori?" Zeke chuckled.

"Uh," Tori stuttered," sorry guys I thought you were someone else."

"Ah it's okay." Zeke grinned. "So, we were wondering if you still had time to give us a few tats."

"Oh sorry guys I was just closing up. I'm going to help out a friend actually so maybe tomorrow?"

"Okay thanks. Sorry for bothering you." Shauna smiled sweetly.

"No problem." Tori responded.

The said their goodbyes and walked out. I sighed. I really wanted to say hi.

"That was close." Tori chuckled.

"Too close, Tori. We gotta be more careful. What if they recognized me?" I asked cautiously.

"Then they'll be happy to know you're alive. Why don't you just tell them?"

"Because I want to do it the right way. And I don't want Tobias to find out from them. Tori, what if they all moved on?"

"Tris… I just talked to Four a little while ago. He's not over you, trust me." She seems to be on the verge of a lecture.

"Let me tell them the way I choose. I don't want anything to turn out wrong."

"Okay." She responded. "Hey, I need to go over to talk to Bud. You can head over to my apartment if you want. It's on floor 3, room 126."

"Thanks Tori, but I have something I need to do anyway." I answer.

"Okay. Come over when you're done."

"I will."

I walk out of the tattoo parlor with my hood disguising me. Even though the sky is darkening, I can't take any chances. Right now, it's just around the time the dauntless would be eating dinner.

I'm basing my plan entirely off of the fact that he might be eating dinner out of his apartment. Here's to hoping…

I turn around a few familiar bends, looking for the one room that gives me memories of safety. The very room that I had been taken care of in, away from the initiates, away from everything. This room was almost like my safe place.

Tobias's apartment.

After many more turns and bend, I arrived in front of a great, big door. I stood in front of it, frozen. What should I do? This is stupid. What if he's here? What will I say?

I started to stress out. There's no time for that right now, I'll just have to deal with what comes at me.

I slowly took a step forward and raised my fist to the door. With two hard taps, I was prepared for the worst.

I waited impatiently with my ear near the door so I could hear any movement inside. There was nothing.

I let out a gigantic sigh of relief. No one's here.

I turned my head right and left to make sure nobody was around. When it was clear that no one would be able to see or hear me, I reached up as high as I could and maneuvered my hand into a crack inside the wood that surrounded the outer edge of his door.

With a few more seconds of searching, I felt something cool and metallic brush against my hand. Got it.

I grabbed onto it and pulled it out of the crack to reveal a silver key. I used my hand to push the key into the lock. A quiet click alerted me that it was done. I opened the door to reveal the apartment that looked exactly the same as the one I remembered. The words Fear God Alone were still scrolled across the wall in red.

I stopped looking around. I didn't come here to observe the room. I need to get started.

I hurried around the room, in search of a piece of paper and a pen. Drawers were scrambled, cabinets were trashed, and objects were knocked over. I'm gonna need to clean this up. After all the mess I made, I finally got my hands on that pen and paper.

I need to hurry. With ten minutes till the end of dinner, I ran around the room trying to put everything back into place. Once finished, I scribbled down a few words onto the white paper and set it on the table against his beside. I then purposely left on the lamp so he would see the note.

I rushed out and shoved the key back into the hole. Time to go. I pulled up my hood and walked quickly away from the room to Tori's. On my way to Tori's, I reviewed everything I did to clean up in my head. I needed something to distract me from the fact that I might see him soon. I repeated the words I wrote over and over in my head.

 **Tobias,**

 **Meet me at the net, 11:30 pm tomorrow night.**

I was scared to think of what could happen. He could attack me, expecting me to be an intruder. He could hate me for not coming back to him. He could yell at me for going to the weapons lab instead of Caleb. He could be disgusted by me and tell me that he never even knew why he liked me. He could tell me that he found someone else. I'm sure it wouldn't be hard, especially with-

Voices interrupted my thoughts. They were close. I pushed myself up against the wall and peeked around the corner so I could try to figure out what they were saying. The voices were to quiet. They sounded like a mumble from the distance I was at.

Suddenly, the voices grew. One was so loud it sounded like a shout for joy. I listened in as a female voice exclaimed "OHHHHH FOURRRRRR! I SAW IT! YOU GUYS KISSEDDDDD!"

Four? As in Tobias? Was that Christina talking?

I turned around the corner and headed closer to them. I couldn't make out a thing they were saying. On my tip-toes, I snuck closer only to hear the loud thud of feet stomping my way. I panicked. What do I do? Where do I go? I decided the best thing to do was look casual so I walked towards the footsteps with my head down. I was just acting like a normal dauntless member that wanted to keep to themselves. I walked slowly, so I could hopefully get a little glance at Tobias. The footsteps got louder and increased in pace. I tried to keep calm and act normal. They echoed like stomps now. I turned my head slightly only to see him ram right into me. I fell to the ground and looked up, only to see him move without the slightest glance back.

My heart ripped. She was talking about Tobias. I choked out a light sob even though I tried to hold it in. Tears welled up at the edge of my eyes and threatened to pour out.

He didn't notice me. He didn't even take the time to see if I was okay. My body started to shake. Reality hit in as I processed what had been said before.

He. Found. Someone. Else.

He kissed her.

He was done with me.

He probably doesn't even care about me.

He's over me.

That realization hit me like a rock. I let the tears spill out. It hurts. My body hurts. My head hurts. Everything just hurts.

I couldn't bear the pain of knowing he moved on. It's only been 3 years. I still loved him after that amount of time.

Did he ever love me?

Don't be stupid. I scolded myself.

I need to stop. I sounded like a teenage girl.

Five seconds of pain. I thought.

One.

A tear slowly fell down my face. "YOU GUYS KISSEDDDDD!"

Two.

I dug my nails into my arm to try to subside some of the pain that I was feeling.

Three.

I thought about what type of woman he would kiss.

Four.

Probably beautiful. Tall, curvy, flirty. She probably had it all. That's what he deserved.

Five.

He's over me so I need to get over it.

I stood up and wiped my cheek on my sleeve.

Well I guess I won't be seeing him tomorrow.

So much for that note.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Tris**_

I told Tori everything. About the note, about seeing Tobias and Christina, and about the girl he kissed. I've been snuggled up on her couch the entire night with a bottle in my hand. I don't know why I'm taking this so hard. The liquid sloshes inside the bottle and I lift it to my lips. I take a big gulp and then let my hand with the bottle dangle off the side of the couch.

My mind begins to grow fuzzy.

The clock blinks 12:00 in a fluorescent green light. I should get up.

I can't remember when Tori left, I just know she had to get up early for work.

 _I really should get up._

But I don't want to… this couch is so warm and comfy. I just wanna lie here for the rest of the day. Maybe the rest of the Month. Tori wouldn't mind, right?

My stomach growls. Drinking on an empty stomach? That's not good.

Who cares anyway? It's not like Tobias does.

The apartment door opens and in walks Tori.

"Alright. Get up, you've been sitting here long enough."

I groan in response.

"Tris, this is not time for a personal pity party. Get off that couch before I kick you out of here."

"Geez! Okay okay, I'm up."

The room starts to sway unusually.

"Tris?" Tori asks in a concerning manner.

"Tori?" I mock in an annoying voice.

"Stop it."

"Stopppp itttttt." I repeat her again.

"Okay you better go get a shower before I slap you." She warns.

"Fineee. I'm going, I'm going."

I turn around and walk to her bathroom. Let's hope the shower gets rid of the giant migraine throbbing against my skull.

A few hours later, Tori and I walk out of her apartment and make our way to the dining hall. Tori said, and I quote, that I can't keep on hiding out forever.

Honestly, I thought that she would be more respectful of how I choose to tell my friends about everything, but instead she's been telling me to suck it up and go for it. She's forcing me to tell my friends that I'm back by tonight. I have no idea how I'm going to do this.

She said a good start would be to get back into routine with the old dauntless environment, so, we decided that it would be best if I ate lunch in the dining hall. With a hoodie on of course. Tori told me that I wouldn't be able to eat with her because all my friends eat right near her. So I'll be sitting in the corner watching as she talks with my friends.

Tori said I should just tell them I'm alive right in the dining hall, but I told her I wanted to wait a little longer.

We walk into the large, open room. I grab the edges of my hood and pull them forward slightly. Tori and I walk together until she gets to her table. I sit close enough so that I am able to hear some of what they're saying without them being able to recognize me.

Zeke, Shauna, and Christina all walk in together and plop down while continuing an animated conversation. Christina is flailing her arms about with wild expressions crossing over her face and Zeke and Shauna both smile and chuckle to what she says.

I miss them so much.

I start to pick up bits and pieces of what they're saying. Christina mentions a name. I think she said Luke but I'm not positive. It's hard to make out what they're saying from afar.

Then I hear Zeke mention a party. He tells them that it's tonight and that Chris should bring this "Luke dude" as her date. Her cheeks blush a little and she says that he would never go.

Everyone pushes her to ask. "C'mon Chris! Anyone would want to date you just give it a chance." Shauna says

"Do it." Zeke states.

"Pleaseeee!" Shauna and Tori plead.

"Fine guys! I'll do it if you shut up!" She jokes.

"Yes!"

The dining hall doors swing open. Through the doors comes the only person I don't want to see right now, Tobias.

"Yo Four!" Zeke yells out. "Come sit with us!"

Four nods in acknowledgement and walks over with a small smile on his face.

It takes everything in me to remove my eyes from him. I can't help it. After so many years, he still looks absolutely gorgeous. His dark brown hair is still cropped short and full lips are mesmerizing. But what still draws me to him is his set of deep blue eyes. Though I can't see them at the moment, I can still picture them perfectly in my mind. My heart aches just thinking of the fact that he is with another woman. He probably never stops smiling around her. He's probably glad that I "died". All we ever did was argue, constantly.

My eyes almost started to tear up while thinking about it. My heart feels like it's been ripped in half, yet again.

No. I can't let him consume me. He's over us, so I should be to.

I let a small hatred start to build up inside me. If he chose to be with another girl, then hating him just might be the best way to get over him.

All the bad things he ever did start to sink back into my mind. Who could ever love such a monster?

 _But he's not. He's Tobias. A strong, smart, loyal, caring, and brave man. How could you not love a person like that?_

I keep on trying to hate him. I really do. But there's just a voice in my head that doesn't let me hate him. And I hate that.

I go over to the tattoo parlor while Tori is on break. We go into a back room and I sit down.

"Do you know how you're going to tell them?"

"I heard them talking today at lunch. Zeke said something about a party. Know anything about that?" I asked.

"Yeah. It's tonight at Zeke's, actually. It starts like at eight I think." She mumbles the last part, trying to remember if the time was correct.

"Do you need to be invited?" I question.

"I don't think so. I think it's more like a 'let's see how many people we can cram into my apartment' party." She chuckles a little bit.

"Okay great!"

"Why were you wondering?" She inquires with a raised eyebrow.

"Tori, tonight I'll be going to a party, with my friends, that don't know I'm back… or even alive. They'll find out tonight. At Zeke's party." I state.

"Finally!" She shouts. "Now go get shopping. You need to be ready for tonight."

"Okay! See you later!" I yell as I walk out of the front doors.

Two hours later, Tori and I are adding finishing touches to my outfit, hair and makeup. She left work early to help me. I haven't dressed up like this in a long time.

Tori moves me to a long mirror and I gasp at the sight in front of me.

My reflection displays a petite blonde that I can barely recognize. I'm wearing a tight black dress that reaches mid-thigh. The neckline is a V-neck that shows a small amount of cleavage. The dress compliments my curves but doesn't make me look trashy. My hair is placed in delicate curls and it flows down to my lower back. I am wearing eyeliner. I applied it myself too. Something Christina taught me to do back at the dauntless compound years ago. I'm also wear some mascara and a small amount of lip gloss. I think I still look like myself with makeup on, just a more noticeable version of me.

"Are you ready?" Tori asks me with a grin.

"I think so…" I reply.

"You're gonna be okay without me?" She questions.

I take a deep breath. "Yeah, yeah. I'll be okay."

"Okay. Good luck, Tris."


	8. Chapter 8

_**Tris**_

I make my way to Zeke's apartment clumsily. Tori forced me into these black heels. I don't know how long I'll be able to walk in them without taking them off.

Music thumps loudly and I know I'm getting closer to the place where my friends and I will reunite. I arrive at the door and, unsurprisingly, it is left wide open for anybody to enter. I walk through and am immediately ambushed with the smell of booze and heat from all the bodies crammed in here. I go onto the tips of my toes to try and find someone, like Christina, but I can't see her anywhere.

I decide to just sit down with a beer. I'll talk to them if I see them. I observe all the people around me. Half of them are dancing. Others are making out. Then there are the ones like me, sitting around with a drink in their hand. There are few that are actually having a real conversation,

I keep on looking around the room. Hopefully I'll spot somebody that I recognize. While searching through the crowd of dancing people, I see someone that I vaguely remember from initiation. I think her name was Lauren. She looks better than the last time I saw her, happier. It's nice to see someone I know, even if I really wasn't close to her.

The feeling of familiarity is distinguished when I see a large hand touch the lower area of her back. _His_ large hand. I stare in astonishment. _He's with Lauren?_ Of course.

She turns to face him and smiles brightly. He returns a small grin and they start a conversation. I can't take my eyes off of them. My stomach lurches inside me. My eyes start to well up. I dig my nails into the palms of my hands. Watching them is killing me but I just cannot stop.

How long have _they_ been together?

They look so good together that it revolts me. She's perfect.

I roll my eyes at the thought. Of course she is! Tobias deserves perfect.

Lauren grabs his hand and pulls him out to the dance floor. He starts to laugh as she wiggles around with a goofy look displayed on her face. Tobias starts to dance along, awfully. You can tell he is trying to be bad. Jealousy is eating me up. I stand up and walk as far away from them as I can. I don't want to start a fight tonight, but if I keep on watching them there will be no way I can stop myself from slapping that bitch across her face.

I've limited myself to the dark corner of Zeke's living room. Everyone seems to be having such a great time. Except for me.

Why did I come here again? Why did I choose to just torture myself?

Right in the middle of my thoughts, I hear somebody yell out "Truth or dare is starting! Anyone who doesn't wanna play needs to leave immediately!"

I watch as all my old friends move over to make a circle in the center of the living room.

This is my only chance to tell them that I'm actually alive. I walk over and take a seat next to a girl I don't recognize. On the other side of me is a man then next to him is Christina. I'm assuming he's the Luke guy she was talking about because she's so infatuated with him that she doesn't notice me.

"Okay, I'll start." Zeke shouts. "Christina, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to sit in Luke's lap." He says with a grin.

She looks at him for approval. He nods and smiles when she climbs onto his lap.

"Ummm…" Christina mumbles looking around the room. Of course she doesn't look where I'm sitting. "Lauren, truth or dare?"

"Dare." Lauren states proudly.

"I dare you to kiss the person you like the most in the room."

Lauren takes a second to think before nodding her head in reassurance and leaning over to kiss Tobias on the cheek. Of course.

I turn away and grimace.

Lauren blushes lightly and she returns back to her original position in seating.

She searches through the group and finds her victim. How come no one noticed me?

"Alyssa, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Who do you think is the most attractive person in this room?"

Alyssa hesitates before responding. "Um… I guess Four?" She speaks almost like a question.

"Okay." Is all Lauren says in reply.

Alyssa examines the area for a new person to trial.

She notices me. She smiles.

"Truth or dare?" She asks while nodding her head at me.

All eyes turn to me. I notice eyes bulging. I hear a gasp from Christina. I turn my head into my lap to avoid eye contact. But when I hear a deep breath of air being released from Tobias's direction, I raise my eyes slowly to face him. His face cannot be described in words. His eyes are frozen on me. His lips slowly and silently release my name and I turn away not wanting to have all my feelings for him return. I've been trying so hard to avoid him. I need to hate him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey everyone! Thank you all for the responses! So like many- or almost all- of you requested, I wrote the next chapter in Tobias's POV. I love all of your reviews so far and hope you keep on writing them!**

 **To: Guest**

 _I think tobias' POV would be great but pleeeeease let Tobias and tris be on friendly terms next, I want Tobias to explain and for tris to understand... I realize that this probably won't happen as you want drama but it would make my day if they were okay again x_

 **I'm sorry but I don't think I'm going to have this happen immediately, or maybe at all. ;) I want to try to make Tobias work to be with Tris again! Hopefully he'll win her over… if nothing happens before then.**

 **Thank you all again for the reviews! I hope you enjoy chapter nine!**

 _ **Tobias**_

I'm on my way to Zeke's party. He invited me earlier but in all honesty I'm just not feeling it. My mood has seemed like it's been on a frickin' rollercoaster over the past few days. I have no idea what's wrong with me but people have started telling me that I've been more dramatic than a teenage girl. I probably have been.

As I walk into the hallway that leads to Zeke's place, I hear a loud bass thudding in music playing. It is booming and it feels like all the walls around me are shaking. I see the open door ahead and groan aloud. I really don't wanna go in there.

The smell of alcohol is brushed into my nostrils. Right there I decide one thing: I will not be staying sober tonight.

I walk in and go to the nearest place that I can find a drink. I'm handed a shot and I down it right there. I'm gonna need a lot more if I wanna have some fun tonight.

After a few more shots, I see Lauren walking through a crowd of people.

 _I know her!_

I hastily move to her side and before I know it, my body is doing some crazy moves while we're dancing. She looks me in the eye. I smirk at her and continue to move along to the beat, kinda.

Lauren leans in really close to my face, like really close, and I just keep on dancing. She pulls my head down so her lips are at my ear and she whispers "Looks like someone's got eyes for you."

She discretely nods over to where the couches are and all I see is the back of a blonde woman.

 _Mmmm I should go talk to her._

I turn to Lauren with an obvious smile and look back to the couches. That woman is gone. I can't see her anywhere.

My head bobs back and forth in attempt to look around the room, but everything seems to be spinning a little. Eh whatever, that happens sometimes.

I continue dancing with Lauren and we laugh and smile the entire time. I don't think she's had anything to drink. But I really wanna check for some reason… I wonder what her lip gloss tastes like… Cherry? Mmmm I like cherry. I turn my head to face her and slam my lips against hers. Ohhhhh they taste like strawberry! I love strawberries! She pulls her head back and gives me a strange look.

"What?" I ask confused. I was enjoying the strawberry!

"I thought you said you didn't want to be with me?"

"I did..? Ohhhhh yeah! I did!" I exclaim.

"Then why did you kiss me?" She gives me an intense glare.

"Well they tasted like strawberry and I like strawberry so…"

She giggles at me.

"Okay, your drunk Four. Here come with me. We'll go get some water."

After our water break, everything stopped seeming so dizzy and I didn't feel as hyper anymore. The room still was swaying slightly but I think getting water into my system helped a ton. Just as me and Lauren walk into the living room, we hear a shout.

"Truth or dare is starting! Anyone who doesn't wanna play needs to leave immediately!"

I look over at Lauren and she nods her head. We walk over to where everyone is sitting and I look around the circle and see the blonde that was staring at me earlier. She looks vaguely familiar but I can't really think of her name since her face is looking away from me.

"Okay, I'll start." Zeke shouts. "Christina, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to sit in Luke's lap." He says with a grin.

She looks at him for approval. He nods and smiles when she climbs onto his lap.

"Ummm…" Christina mumbles looking around the room. Of course she doesn't look right next to her. "Lauren, truth or dare?"

"Dare." Lauren states proudly.

"I dare you to kiss the person you like the most in the room."

Lauren stops and thinks over what she's about to do. She nods a little bit and turns over to plant her lips on my mouth.

My eyes bulge out of my head. I'm too shocked to move. I thought she didn't like me like that.

Lauren turns away from me as fast as she kissed me and I can see a small blush forming on her cheeks. She turns her head back and forth to find the next person to go.

"Alyssa, truth or dare?" Lauren questions.

"Truth."

"Who do you think is the most attractive person in this room?"

Alyssa hesitates before responding. "Um… I guess Four?" She speaks it almost like a question.

"Okay." Is all Lauren says in reply.

Alyssa examines the area for a new person to trial.

She stops her search when her eyes land on the pretty blonde. She looks so familiar. I still can't recognize her because she seems to not want to look over in my direction. She smiles at her.

"Truth or dare?" She asks while nodding her head at the girl.

Blondie then turns over to face me.

All thoughts going through my head stop in an instant. My mind is completely blank. That woman- she looks almost exactly like… Tris. I mouth her name as I think it in my mind. No. It can't be Tris. I saw her dead. I felt how cold she was. There is no way that is Tris.

But there she sits. Full of life. Her eyes; they have a storm brewing in them. A sky covered in grey and blue. Both swirling around each other, like a tornado forming. Tris. My hands start to shake and my mind goes into over-drive. How? What? That-that's not possible, at all. What's happening? Am I dreaming?

"Tris" turns her body away from me and answers Alyssa.

"Truth." Is what finally comes out of her mouth after what feels like an eternity.

"Tell me why everyone is acting so weird right now." Alyssa demands.

"I'm kind of like a long lost friend I guess." Is all she says as her answer.

That is Tris. Profanities stream through my mind. How did I not notice her earlier?

I feel all blood start to drain out of my head. Everything's getting dizzy.

 _This isn't possible. It isn't. It just isn't._


	10. Chapter 10

_**Tobias**_

Everything is so hard to process. My girlfriend, who is supposed to be dead, is sitting right in front of me playing a game. _I see her lifeless eyes. I feel her tiny, pale hand. It has no warmth. There is no sign of life in this body. But it's more than a body. It's the woman I love. And she, by all definition, is dead._

I feel numb. There should be a better reaction coming from me. I'm not crying. Christina is. She's laying in Tris's arms sobbing her heart out. What's wrong with me?

I look at Tris again. I really look at her. She's extremely thin and pale, with her hair grown out and her eyes igniting with joy. A few tears run down her eyes as she whispers into Christina's ear.

And that's when everything hits me. It all blows up in my face. She's here.

I don't know whether I should run to her and tackle her with a hug and push my lips against her as fast as possible or shout her name out so the entire world can hear. But before I could act on either idea, Tris stands with Christina, holding onto her for dear life. Christina is laughing and crying at the same time. Tris looks around the room. She completely avoids my eyes. It pains me to say so. Does she even remember me?

"I think I'm going to leave with her." Tris says while letting out a small giggle while pointing at Chris. "Thank you all for a fun night. Goodbye."

She walks out the door with an emotional Christina wrapped around her body.

She can't not remember me! Greif and sorrow flood my body. I can't help but remember everything from before. Then I see her body lying on a flat, cold surface yet again. Gone. The woman I fell in love with was gone. And now she's not. I stand up. I need her. I miss her. I love her.

She's back. Against all odds this woman somehow survived and I want to know how.

I shove my body out the door and look back and forth, consistently, for a sign of which way they went. I hear a few laughs to the left so I race across the hall, taking multiple different turns to try to catch them. I need to see her.

I push myself to my limit, sprinting with every muscle in my body. My shoes smack the stone floor loudly, making an echo throughout the area.

It feels like Tris is almost avoiding me because the next time I turn a corner to catch them, their speed has increased and they're almost around the next bend.

"Tris!" I scream trying to get her attention.

Her body stiffens and her speed increases even more. She heard me. I can tell.

I race after her again and as I near them, Tris hurries her pace. I was done having to chase after her. I pushed myself till I feel a strong burn within me. It starts in my toes and flows up through my body to the tips of my fingers. I was getting very close. Christina was slowing her down too, so she couldn't go too fast.

At last I reach her, sweaty and out of breath. I block her path as an attempt to stop her.

"Tris." I whisper breathily. "You're back."

She doesn't look at me. Her shoes seem to be the most interesting object around right now.

"Tris?" I question.

She still doesn't move.

I hook my finger underneath her chin and tilt her head upwards. Her eyes are building up a storm. Emotions radiate off of her. But every single one seems to be intertwining with another. I have no idea what she's thinking right now. It feels like she's mentally building up a wall to keep us apart.

"How? How are you here?" I query intently.

I look at her again. Her eyes were so distracting that I almost forgot everything. I almost forgot that she was supposed to be dead. I reach in and wrap my arms around her waist. She smells so good. Like vanilla. And her body is warm, unlike the last time I touched her. But all that doesn't matter right now, because she is frigid in my embrace.

"What's wrong?" I ask confused.

She just stares blankly.

"Tris! Answer me. Are you okay?"

"No." She states fiercely. "Go away. Now."

"What?"

"Go away _Four_!" Tris spits my name like venom.

I don't respond. Why isn't she hugging me? Why isn't she happy to see me? Why aren't we celebrating?

She side-steps me like a small puddle on the sidewalk.

"Tris!" I yell after her. "What's going on? Why aren't you talking to me?"

"Why don't you ask Lauren?" She yells back.

In a second she's out of my sight.

I think I start to cry. But I'm not really sure. All I can feel is the aching pain in my chest. The one I have been in love with- and constantly mourning over- for years is finally back, and she is completely, utterly, and undoubtedly… _over me._


	11. Chapter 11

**OMG! I love you guys so much! Thank you for the reviews! I seriously love reading all of them! You guys are so sweet!**

 _ **IceFire15**_

 _ **My eyes are leaking. Stupid eyes. :(**_

 _ **Hope you update soon!**_

 **To: IceFire15**

 **Seriously?** **That's actually awesome lol! I didn't know that people actually got into this story that much! I kinda thought this chapter was like really boring and uninvolved… I was writing it in small sections at a time so I didn't feel that good about it. I think I really need to write a chapter all in one sitting for me to think it's ok… I'm so glad you have consistently read and wrote reviews to my story! I love reading them! Thanks so much!**

 **Also thanks to everyone who has kept up with this story! I love all your reviews! Please keep responding and tell me what you think I can improve on! I need all the help I can get.**

 **Hope you enjoy chapter 11!**

 _ **Tobias**_

"Yo, Four!" Zeke shouts out.

I don't move. My position in this cold hallway is unnecessary, but I won't budge.

"Bro, what's wrong?"

My body is unresponsive. I can see him. But my eyes are about the only thing in me that is working correctly right now. His voice seems muffled, like he's speaking to me under water.

He grabs my shoulders and starts to shake them. It makes my entire body feel like jelly.

"Four, are - you - okay?" He asks slowly

"Mhm." Is the only word I can manage to squeeze out.

"Dude you're not okay. What's going on?"

I lift up my shoulders, then drop them back down with slow movements.

"What happened?"

"Tris." I state.

He furrows his eyebrows and looks me straight in the eye. "I thought you would be happy to find out she's back. It's surprising but..."

He stops his sentence and his eyes become alarmed.

"Four, what happened out here?"

I suck in a breath. "She doesn't want to see me." I mumble, dejected.

"What…?"

"She. Doesn't. Want. To. See. Me."

His voice grows quiet. "That can't be right… you guys are like a dauntless power couple."

"Well she's over me so…" I turn my head to the ground. He can't see me cry. I never have in front of him before. Not here. Not now. Please.

"Are you sure?" He questions like he's treading on thin ice. Like at any moment, I will break. But he shouldn't have to worry about that, because I think I already am broken. Ever since she gave me that icy glare.

"Yes." I just want to be left alone. Why can't he see that?

"I'm sorry mate." He said looking at his feet.

"Yeah. Me too." I turn and start to walk away.

I get to my apartment and push through the door. I slam it closed and the room shakes.

"Damn it Tris!" I scream out.

I clench my fist and throw it at the wall. I hear a crack. I really don't feel any pain. I see the blood against my wall. And I see the dent in it. I don't care. I whip my head around and find an object close to me. I lunge at it. My arms throw it towards the wall with everything I have in me. I look at the ground. Splintered pieces of wood rest on the ground. They are the remains of an old chair. Blood is pumping throughout my body. The veins are pulsing in my arms. I slam a bottle against a hard surface and watch it shatter to the floor. It lands right next to the wood. I slam my shoulder to the wall. _Why won't the pain leave me?!_ I grab at my wrist and dig my nails into the flesh. I feel the heat from the blood but no pain. I can only feel pain in my chest.

"AHHH!" I roar.

I throw myself at the wall again and again. I try different angles. I try banging my fists against it. _Nothing._

I fall against the cool plane. I slide slowly to the floor. Tears bubble out of my eyes. Hot, wet tears. I squeeze the lids shut. My hands find my hair and I pull at it. I shout and scream and yell. But the pain doesn't subside. I press my nails into the palms of my hands. Tears collide with others and they all stream down my face and then drop to the ground. All I can do is cry. Right now, that's my only solution. I have no logical response or no way to handle this correctly, so I just let the small droplets fall.

I stumble blindly to my bedroom. I find my bed and drop to it. The tears still don't stop. Then, everything goes black.

 _My feet are cold. My body is cold. I look down and see black. I look up and see gray. Then, I feel more coldness. Looking down, I see black seeping over my feet. But it's not black. It the deepest blue I have ever witnessed. It is water. And I am on a stone in the middle of the ocean. The waves grab and pull at my legs. My body is weak. I shake every time the waves hit me. They almost seem angry. The way they fall, it's like they want to hurt me. The ocean grows louder and with a rush of wind to assist it, I fall. The water lapses around my body. I flail my arms. It just starts to swallow me. I swing my eyes back and forth before my face is pulled underneath the furious ocean. I see her. Everything stops. She stands on a rock. I gurgle out her name. She smiles genuinely, like she's happy that I'm drowning, and gives me a wave goodbye. The waves come back with even more rage than before. They clasp onto my body. The last thing I see is her cold, unforgiving eyes. And then I sink. Deeper and deeper into the dark. My lungs are being crushed. But the only thing I can think of is her eyes. I'm dying. I am dying and she doesn't care._


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys! Sorry for updating so late. I was planning on doing it by like Wednesday to Thursday, but I just never got to it. I'm such a procrastinator! But anyways, thank you all for keeping up with the stories and reviews! Love them so much! Please keep reviewing and I'll try to keep up with the story!**

 **Hope you enjoy chapter twelve!**

 _ **Tobias**_

My body flings up out of my bed. I look around me for the angry waves, for the dark rock, for anything. But I'm just standing in my room with the same clothes on that I was wearing yesterday. A noise is banging in my living room. I hurry out of my bedroom to find out what's going on. My living room is trashed. Multiple things are broken and stuff is strewn across the floor. The banging gets louder. It's coming from my front door. Who would be awake at this ungodly hour? I open up the door and of course Zeke is standing there, wide awake.

"What?" I mumble with a hoarse voice.

"You good? Everyone went to breakfast and you didn't show…"

"For real?" I ask. "Dude, I just woke up."

"Oh sorry." He laughs a little.

Zeke's face goes serious and I know what is about to come.

"Are you seriously okay though?"

"Yeah, I guess." I answer, ignoring the fact that his eyes have changed their focus to my living room.

"You don't seem okay. Look at you your place. It's a mess."

"Zeke, I really don't wanna talk about it." I state.

"I know. I wouldn't either." He says understandingly.

"Okay then, now that you know I'm okay I'm gonna go back to sleep. Have fun at breakfast." I start to close the door.

But soon enough, his hand has found its way in between my door and the wall. He pushes it open and walks straight into my apartment. _Typical Zeke._

"So I know you said you don't want to talk about it, but I think it'd be a lot better if you did." He says calmly.

"Zeke, really?" I said, annoyance laced throughout my voice.

"Best way to get over it is to admit what's going on." He says.

Zeke casually walks into my kitchen.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"Hmm…" He mumbles going through my cabinets. "Well I was going to find something to eat, but you have like NOTHING dude!"

"Go ahead and make yourself at home." I grumble to him.

"You need to calm it bro." He states walking back into the living room. I follow behind and sit next to him on the couch.

"Okay…" He looks at me like I'M the problem. "What are we gonna do about this?" He mumbles a little bit.

"Zeke, I really don't want to talk about it. Can you please leave?"

"Four, look. You got rejected right? So? You dated her for how long? And you're gonna give up now? I don't think so."

"What do you mean?" I ask hesitantly.

"You really think she doesn't have a reason for rejecting you?"

"Well… I mean… Like what if she doesn't even remember me?" I say awkwardly.

"Wow bro, you need to gain some more confidence. This is _Tris_ , Not some random chick that you picked up along the road. She was madly in love with you, probably still is. So you can't just let her go."

"But I don't know what to DO, Zeke! I just don't understand. She said she didn't want to see me. I think that's a sure enough sign that she's over me." I respond frustrated. It hurt to talk about this. So much.

"Dude, did anything happen before she said that? Like anything that could've offended her?" He asks quickly, like he's trying to analyze my situation.

"No." I think back to when I first saw her. "Yeah, nothing that I remember."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Why?"

"Because what you said made it sound like she was hurt."

"Since when did you understand women?" I question critically.

"Since Shauna." He murmurs back. "Four, you need to try. You need to get her to want to be with you again. Go find her."

"No. She'll just blow me off." I state.

Zeke glares at me. "Well then go get some balls and THEN do it."

"Dude. I just don't wanna make her mad."

"Okay… we need Shauna. I'm calling her." He grabs his phone and starts to dial her number.

"Whoa! No! We don't need the whole world knowing about this!" I reach for his phone but he just pulls away and holds it to his ear.

"I tell Shauna everything, so she'll find out one way or another. Might as well just tell her now

"Zeke!"

He mumbles a few things into the phone then ends the call.

"Sorry. Too late." He smirks.

I roll my eyes at him.

Soon enough, there is a knock on my door a few minutes later.

"C'mon in babe!" Zeke shouts.

Shauna walks in and sits down right next to Zeke. He gives her a quick kiss on the cheek and she asks him what's going on. He starts to tell her everything, without even checking to see if it was okay.

"Okay Four…" She pauses to think for a second. "You need to start with a nice gesture you know? Like a note or a sign or something she likes."

I think about that for a second. What does Tris like? This question stumps me. She likes adventure, but she won't even talk to me, so how would I even start with that? Something sweet… She's not very girly, but people tell me that flowers can always work.

"What about flowers?" I ask Shauna.

"Yes! Good idea!" She shouts. Then she furrows her eyebrows like she's trying to remember something.

"Okay." She mumbles to herself. "Four, I need a pen and paper."

I go to get one and am back at the couch within a minute.

She motions for me to hand it to her, so I do. Shauna starts scribbling words onto the small little paper. Then she hands it to me and directs me to go buy the type of flowers she had written down.

 _Purple Hyacinths_

 _Meaning: I am Sorry._

I look up from the paper to Zeke and Shauna. They smile with reassurance. I stand up and I'm out of the door within a few seconds.

I'm getting my girl back.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey everyone! Okay so I really have loved reading ALL of your reviews! I can't even begin to say how much I appreciate every single one of you! Okay so today I'm gonna mention a few reader's reviews because they made me laugh or actually like consider what's going on in the story.**

 _Coleybear805_ _:_

 _I'm so glad Zeke isn't letting him give up that easy. maybe he could send Shauna to talk to Tris and find out why she's upset._

 **The idea of Shauna visiting Tris is brilliant, but I think I'm planning to have it play out in a different way.** **Thank you for the suggestion though! I really like that idea!**

 **I had written that response ( ^ ) to you earlier before I wrote the story, Coleybear805. But I am going to add your idea to this chapter! Thanks so much!**

Echo in the Whispering Wind:

Go Four! You can do this! I think I'm seriously obsessed with this story.

 **I'm honestly so flattered that you like my story! And keep on rooting for Four ;) Let's hope he'll get Tris back! I don't even know whether or not it's gonna happen… but I have an idea of what might!**

paula'08:

Happy he's gonna try to get Tris back. This is all a misunderstanding, and they should really talk about it. I love Zeke, he's hilarious, and him when he just got in the apartment and then told Tobias he was gonna tell Shauna anyways got me laughing so bad. This is amazing.

 **Paula'08, thank you for constantly reviewing! I love seeing what you have to say! And also thank you for saying that about Zeke! I was trying to make his personality seem kind of care-free and fun so it really makes me excited that you found him hilarious! Were you really laughing? That's so great omg! Keep up the reviews!**

 **Ok thank you everyone! I'll try to keep posting some reviews before the story (well if that's what you guys want.) Respond and tell me if you like or dislike when I put your reviews at the top! Thanks for reading!**

 **Hope you enjoy chapter 13!**

 _ **Tris**_

 _-When Tobias follows her out the door-_

I hurry out the door. He can't see me, not now, maybe never. Who knows? All I know I that I can't risk it. I can honestly say that any interaction with him could kill me. I know that he has too much power over me, I love him, but I can't see him. He's happy with another woman, so I will not put myself in between them. It's only best for the both of us.

I hurry down the hall. Christina is holding onto me, giggling in a drunken state, though I don't believe she had any alcohol.

"Chris, Chris!" I whisper harshly.

The door from Zeke's apartment slams behind me. I tug on Christina in attempt to hurry her. It doesn't help.

"You need to be quiet!" I whisper again.

"Why?" She practically shouts, running off of pure ecstasy.

"Because, we're trying to avoid someone." I answer harshly.

"Who?" She asks laughing.

Christina looks around us. "I don't see anyone!" She says loudly.

"Tris!" I hear echo down through the hall. _No no no no NO!_

I push my hand atop of Christina's mouth. She squirms and squeals but I keep my grip tight. No need to blow my cover. I continue walking, but at a much quicker pace.

I hear quick footsteps behind me. He's getting closer. I pick up my feet, no longer letting them shuffle against the cold floor. I can hear his deep breaths. _I need to get away._

I pull hard on Christina's arm. She struggles to keep up with me as I try to break into a run. I don't get far though. I stop in my tracks, because standing right in front of me is Tobias.

I gasp and try to turn away, but I stop when he whispers "Tris. You're back."

I don't know what to say. He has no idea how badly I want to kiss him. I mentally discipline myself for thinking like that. I still need to hate him.

I try to build up hate towards him. I try so hard. I think of all our arguments, every rude or hateful remark, yet every time I remember bad things that have happened, I also remember the good ones. Like the Ferris wheel and his fear landscape. It feels so long ago now.

Through all this thinking, I find myself focusing on the floor.

"Tris?" He asks.

I try my hardest not to look up. _Hate. I need to hate._

Tobias tilts my chin so that I am forced to look into his eyes. My heart flutters just looking at him. I missed him so much.

I push these emotions away, trying to cover them with hate.

"How? How are you here?" He asks with such admiration in his eyes that I practically melt.

I expected anger. I expected a fight. I expected him to call me suicidal. I did not expect this.

His face contorts, like a sudden realization comes to mind. He then encloses me in his arms. I try my hardest not to fall into him, not to squeeze him back, not to shout out how much I love him. The best reaction that I can think of right now is to not react, so I don't move.

"What's wrong? He asks confused.

I still don't respond.

 _Hate, hate, hate!_ I continue to chant that in my head. I allow a picture of Lauren to fill my mind, and that about does it for me.

"Tris! Answer me. Are you okay?" He asks with a worried expression.

"No." I respond angrily. "Go away. Now."

"What?"

I don't feel bad for him. Now that I think of it, he's happy. He left me. Why should I feel bad at all?

"Go away Four!" I start to use his name against him.

I started to walk away.

"Tris!" He yells after me. "What's going on? How did you get here? Why aren't you talking to me?"

I yell the first thing that comes to mind.

"Why don't you ask Lauren?"

And I walked away, with Christina holding on tight to my arm.

 _ **A day later…**_

 _Tris,_

 _A rose could represent the love I have for you, but what is love without trust? So instead I sent these purple flowers- I don't remember the name… That was Shauna's specialty- to show how sorry I am. I love you Tris. So much. I don't understand why you won't talk to me. Please, just talk to me! I miss your voice._

 _Love always,_

 _Tobias_

His note was short and straight to the point. Not the typical way to write an apology, but Tobias isn't a very typical person. But how can he want to see me when he has Lauren? And how can I bear to stand in the way of their happiness?

Ugh! This was all so frustrating! I know I'm being ridiculous! But if he really loved me, would he have felt the need to find someone else? But wouldn't I want him to find someone if I was dead? Wouldn't I want him to be happy? Of course! And now that he found his happiness, I can't help but feel hurt. So I decided to distance myself. Good or bad? Who knows, but this keeps the pain of rejection away from me. If I reject him, he couldn't hurt me more… right?

No. But why does it hurt so much?

I outwardly groan because of the internal fight running through my head. How am I supposed to figure anything out if I can't even make up my own mind?

I run my fingers through my hair. I grab the purple flowers and chuck them at the door. I'm getting so tired of myself and my stupid emotions. If only I could turn them off…

I hear a little groan from my living room and it takes me a second to remember that Christina stayed over last night.

I walk over to her on the couch.

"Hey Tris." She says, yawning. Her hair is sticking up everywhere, but I can't find it anywhere in me to laugh.

"Hi Chris." I mumble back, staring straight ahead.

"What's up?" She asks like nothing ever happened between us, like I was never dead.

"Eh." I say back.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asks calmly.

"No thanks. Not right now at least." I say back.

"I can't believe you're here." She says with a smile spread across her face. She's beaming.

"I missed you so much, Christina." I state and pull her into a hug.

"I thought you were dead!" She sobs into my shoulder.

"I was actually." I whisper back.

"What?" She asks.

"Nothing." I state.

"Did you say what I think you said?" She asks with a small tear still on her cheek. She quickly wipes it off her face. "That's enough crying for this week." She giggles at her own comment.

I laugh back.

"Tris, did you say you were dead?"

"Yeah…" I mumble casually.

"You were DEAD?! How are you here?" She almost shouts.

"I'm a ghost." I say with a giggle.

Christina slaps my arm. "Don't tease me like that! You know I can be gullible sometimes." She pauses and stares straight at me. "Wait… you aren't, right?"

I absolutely loose it and burst out in laughter. "You are gullible, Chris!" I squeeze between my chuckles.

"Ha-ha. Now tell me what I missed." Christina demands.

"Well you didn't miss much. Just being dead. Then suddenly I'm alive." I say sarcastically. "Oh yeah. And don't forget about David 'experimenting' on me to find out how I'm 'sooo genetically pure.'"

"He experimented on you?" She asked.

"Pretty much." I say back.

"For how long?" Chris questions.

"Ummm… two years?" I answer like a question.

"Two years?! I'm gonna kill him! What did they do?"

"It's kind of hard to describe. Sometimes the easy ones, like x-rays. Other times it was something like a fear landscape. I don't know how else to say it. Oh, and the technology. One time they put me to sleep for like a day to 'look around.'"

"What do you mean?"

"They got like some freakish tools and searched around INSIDE MY BODY so they could identify how I responded to the new serum they created, unlike everyone else."

"WHAT?!" She screamed.

"Yeah. But I'm out of there now." I say trying to change the subject. I have some painful memories from that.

"And I couldn't be happier about that. What serum are you talking about?" She continues.

"Well they were working on a new serum called the Revival Serum. They said something about how I was responsive to it, but none of the other contestants reacted to it."

"What do you mean?" She asked confused.

"I'm the only one who survived when being tested with the serum."

"And they needed you to figure out how to get it to work on other people." She realizes.

"Yup." I say, popping the 'p'.

"I'm so sorry."

I nod.

"How did you get out?"

"I actually was planning an escape for a while. I hate that place. It made me go insane."

"Really?" She says surprised.

"Yeah, I felt like someone was watching my thoughts or something, from all the experiments, ya know?" I try to smile to make this topic seem more light-hearted.

"I hate them." She whispers.

"Me too." I whisper back.

"So you never told me the rest, how'd you get out?" Christina steers right back into the conversation.

"I found a gun in a lab one time, then stored it in my cell. I waited for many months and memorized the hallways. They let me go outside once a month, with guards of course, so I remembered that exact route. Then I finally left on the day of a new experiment that they were gonna try on me."

"I would never think to do that." She speaks.

"Yeah well when you're held up that long…" I trail off remembering it. That memory is my personal hell.

"True." Chris states.

"So, I saw you with that guy at the party!" I cheerily exclaim in attempt to change the subject.

"Yeah! Luke!" A smile grows on Christina's face.

"Ohhhhh!" I smirk. "Tell me about him!"

"Tris! He's blonde and hot! And he's hilarious! And smart! And super sweet! I can't wait for you to meet him!" She grows more excited the more she talks about him. _He's a good one._

"Are you dating?" I wiggle my eyebrows at her.

"No, silly!" She waves her hand with a small blush appearing on her cheeks.

"Are you going to?" I demand excitedly.

"I hope so!" She squeals.

I lean in and hug her, both smiling.

We go on to talk about what's been going on with her life while I was gone.

Time passed and we were still talking. Soon enough, dinner came by.

Christina and I walked to the dining hall, arm in arm.

We came in and I got a hamburger. We laughed as we talked about my first hamburger. Great memories. But my laughter slowed as the doors open and Tobias walks straight in.

His blue eyes find mine from across the room. It looks like he's trying to say something to me.

Christina leans over and whispers in my ear. "This sexual tension is so thick, I could cut it with a knife."

I smack her arm and she giggles uncontrollably. I can't help but laugh along.

We go and sit down. Of course Tobias is there. He looks at me but doesn't say anything. What is he doing?

Maybe he really just doesn't care enough to talk to me. Maybe the flowers were a joke. I was actually considering accepting his apology but now… no, I need to stop thinking about this. It just drives me crazy. It's not worth it.

I continue joking along with Christina and laughing along with the others. When they bring up my death, I just say that I'd prefer not to talk about it.

Time goes on and soon enough, lunch is over. I walk out and back to my apartment. Tobias doesn't follow me. I'm starting to really get worried about him.

I come back to my room and Shauna is standing against my door.

"Hey…" I say with a confused tone.

"Hey. Can I come in? I need to talk to you." She asks.

"Um, sure." I respond.

I walk into my apartment with Shauna right behind me. The room is pitch black. I flick on the light to reveal my tan couch and brown coffee table. It has a small rug underneath and a few decorations scattered around. I plop down into the couch and pat the area next to me. I have a feeling this is going to take a while.

Shauna slowly sits down and looks directly at me.

"So I don't really know how to say this right…" She states.

"Just let it out." I say, ready to get the conversation over with.

"Okay. I don't think you're being fair to Four. You, the love of his life, suddenly come back. He's elated to see you. But you ignore him. Then when he tries to talk to you, his GIRLFRIEND, you lash out on him. That's not okay, Tris. What is wrong with you?" She says passionately. Her hands wave back and forth with every word.

"I have my reasons." I cross my arms over my chest like a defense.

"Well they better be freaking good! He's beating himself up over this!" She yells.

"They are." I respond with fire in my voice.

"What are they?" She requires.

"I don't want to talk about it." I speak with sass overflowing from my mouth.

"Look, I'm sorry if I came off strong. I just don't want to see him like this. Four is a mess."

"He seemed fine to me." I stand my ground. I'm not gonna talk to her about this especially because of the way she approached the subject.

"He was torn up Tris. What's going on?" She tries to say coolly.

"I really don't want to talk about it." I say.

"Come on. It's okay. I just want to fix this. By the look of it, you both are not doing so well." She tries to persuade me.

"No." I retort.

"Tris…" She pleads.

"He doesn't love me anymore, okay?!" I burst out.

"Where'd you get that idea from?" She asks with concern filling her voice.

"He's with someone else." I say quietly.

"No he's not…" She goes off, thinking about something.

"Look, Shauna. I don't mean to offend you but I don't want to talk about this. Can you please leave?" I ask with little patience.

"Wait. Who is he seeing?" She pries.

"Please go. I really don't want to continue talking about this."

"Tris, I will. Just clear it up for me… please." Shauna pleads.

"Lauren, okay? He's seeing Lauren! You happy now? Did you really just want to re-open the wound?" I cried.

"He's not seeing her…"

"He is! Don't lie to me! I SAW them! I saw it okay? There's no reason to lie. Now please go, Shauna."

"Tris… You don't understand. He's not- They're not-"

"Shauna, go! Please! I don't know how much more I can ask you." She won't stop. I don't know what to do. It hurts… a lot.

"Tris wait! Just hear me out!" She says hurriedly.

"Look Shauna, I know that I'm being overdramatic or petty. They make each other happy. It just hurts to think about it. I will talk to him eventually and we will eventually become friends again, if he wants to. I just need a little time to process it. Okay? Sound good?" I speak. Tears are starting to build up at the edges of my eyelids. I can't let her see me cry.

"They aren't togeth-"

I interrupt her.

"Thank you for talking to me." I try to say without crying. "But I would really like it if you would leave, now." I finish quietly.

She nods her head and tells me to have a good night. I hear the door close and I grab a pillow and squeeze hard. _Don't cry. Don't cry._

I stand up and move around a little. _Don't think about him. Don't do it._

I can't help it. My mind wanders back to him and the tears start to come. Long and slow. Clear and warm. They make a waterfall on my face and pull the mascara- that Christina applied earlier- with them. I move over to my room and throw myself onto my bed. I pick up my pillow and waft the smell up my nostrils. Oddly enough, it's usually the best tactic to calm myself down. But it doesn't work this time. I sob long and hard, with awkward noises escaping my throat.

 _Why'd she have to bring it up? Why did I let her talk to me?_

I lay on my bed and the tears fall. I grab the sheets between my fingers and pull them off the bed. I chuck pillow and then squeeze my fists to stop the pain.

 _Shower._

I stand up and move to the bathroom. I just hope that a shower will calm me down.

Once the steam fills the bathroom and collects on the mirror, I climb into the burning shower. My body is encased with a warm sensation. My hair grows dark as it absorbs the liquid. I scream and yell, banging my fists against the wall. I finally calm down, only letting little tears run with the water. After the tears finally stop, I climb out, put on clothes, and lay down on my bed. I turn on a soft song next to me and fall asleep, the words consuming me. Tobias fills my mind the entire time.

 _Little do you know_

 _How I'm breaking while you fall asleep_

 _Little do you know_

 _I'm still haunted by the memory_

 _Little do you know_

 _I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece_

 _Little do you know_

 _I need a little more time_

 _Underneath it all I'm held captive by the hole inside_

 _I've been holding back_

 _For the fear that you might change your mind_

 _I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight_

 _Little do you know_

 _I need a little more time…_

 **How do you like it? Little depressing but hopefully it'll get better!** **The song just written was** _ **Little Do You Know by Alex & Sierra. **_**Hope you guys enjoyed chapter 13! Review back please!**

 **The first story I would like to recommend is:** _ **Sleeping With Strangers**_ **by WritersOfTheRain**

 **Review if you have already read/ are currently reading/ or just started this story! Thanks for reading!**


	14. Chapter 14

**So… I finally had the time to update! It's not that great though, so don't be too excited. I didn't really read over it so if there are any mistakes, please ignore them. It's been a while. Thanks for the reviews everyone! And especially thanks to my one guest who responded after my author's note. Hope you guys enjoy chapter 14!**

 _ **Tris**_

"Tris." Someone whispers in my ear. "Tris…" They whisper again. "Tris!" I jump out of my bed completely alert.

The space around me is dark. I can barely see my own hand moving in front of my face. I think it's probably around 3:00 in the morning.

I turn on my light and see Christina standing right in front of me.

"What do you want, Chris?" I grumble.

"Well…" She says with a sheepish smile.

"Well what? It's freaking 3 in the morning! This better damn good." I speak harshly.

"Ummm…" She hesitates.

"Just spit it out." I tell her.

"Luke asked me out!" She squeals.

I want to complain about how she woke me up to tell me such a petty thing, but I know she's been waiting forever for this to happen. I'm also kind of excited for her because though I can't get my love life straight, she's moving on from Will. And Luke seems perfect for her so I'm genuinely excited that this happened.

"Yes!" I shout out.

"I know!" She yells back.

"I'm so excited for you! Congrats!"

"Thanks, Tris! I'm so glad you're back! I need you around for stuff like this." She says and gives me a hug. I hug her back and can't help but let out a laugh.

"What?" She asks.

"You decided to tell me at three in the morning! Where were you before?" I giggle.

"At a party." She responds with a small laugh.

"At three in the morning?" I start to laugh harder.

"Okay… maybe I went to Luke's apartment." She whispers.

I start to chuckle and it turns into a laughing fit.

"Christina! The first day you're dating and you're already in his pants!"

"I never said that." She defends, trying not to smile.

"Hmm… so then what did you do in his apartment?" I demand.

"Well… we uhm watched a movie?" She says more like a question than a statement.

"What movie?"

"Okay, okay you got me!" She raises her hands in surrender.

"Gettin' it, Chris!" I scream in happiness.

We both start to laugh again and I continue to crack jokes about Christina and Luke.

"Okay Chris, I just realized that you're still in my apartment and you've been in here for like 2 hours. Go back to your man!"

"Kay!" She responds happily. "Thanks! Wish me luck!" She yells walking out my door.

"Good luck! Use protection!" I yell as the door slams shut.

I sit on my living room couch and wallow in the happiness from my conversation. I wish everyday was like this. Carefree and fun. I can't wait to see them together. Christina and Luke. It even sounds good. Kind of like Tobias and Tris…

I smack my forehead. I need to stop thinking about him so much. It's not healthy. But being with him just felt… right.

I stand up and hurry out the door.

I need a distraction.

I walk down the dark halls and try to figure out where I'm going. Florescent lights illuminate the stone floor about every 10 yards I walk. I reach a dark area between the lights and hear footsteps coming towards me. I stop in my tracks as I remember the night I was attacked and almost faced death. The footsteps come to a stop right in front of me.

"Are you okay?" A deep voice lets out.

I can see the frame of this man: tall, lean, and muscled. I can also make out some of his facial features if I look hard enough. He has short hair, a chiseled face, and perfectly proportional lips. In the dark, he looks gorgeous. I wonder what he looks like in the light.

"Yes, I'm fine. Thanks." I shake my head and come to my senses.

"You sure? Do you need anything?" He sounds concerned.

"Yeah I'm really okay." I say, somewhat convincingly.

"Okay…" He sounds unsure. "Well, my name's Damon." He smiles. Damon then reaches his hand out for me to take.

I giggle and shake the hand he pushes towards me.

"I'm Tris." I say with a smile on my face.

"Pretty name for a pretty girl." He says with a smirk, or at least I think it's a smirk. It's hard to see in the dark.

"You can't even see me." I say with a laugh.

"I can tell." He states.

"Sure." I say sarcastically. "Well Damon, you're quite a flirt, aren't you?"

"Just a little." He smiles, pinching his fingers together.

I smile and laugh. The grin won't seem to leave my face, it's starting to hurt.

"So Tris, what are you doing out this early in the morning?"

"Just trying to get out a little. I was tired of my apartment. What are _you_ doing out here?" I challenge back.

"Eh, same. I was wide awake so I walked out my door and now here I am." He speaks casually, making hand motions as he talks.

"I've never seen you around here before. Are you new?" I ask.

"Nah, I've been here for about 2 years now." He answers. "Now that I think about it, I haven't seen you around here either. Did you come recently?"

"No, I just haven't been in Dauntless in a while." I sigh while looking at my surroundings. It all looks exactly like I remember it. They didn't change much while I was gone.

"And why is that?"

"It's a long story, Damon." I say.

"Okay, okay. I guess I'll just have to see you again so I can hear this story."

I smile and nod.

"That'd be fun."

"Well then, Tris, I hope we see each other again soon." He grins at me.

"Me too." I say and he turns and walks away.

He is absolutely amazing. I Sigh and watch his figure retreat into the darkness.

I hope I see him again. I really do.

 **Ok guys! What'd you think? And how about Damon? What do you think about him? Please respond with thoughts and/or ideas!**

 **My next story recommendation would be** _ **Into the Night**_ **by** _ **purplestar613.**_ **Reply if you've read it and love it as much as me!** **Thanks for reading chapter 14!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey guys! Guess who's finally back with a new chapter? This gal! But I am updating from my phone, so please try to ignore any mistakes. So as much as I wanted to respond to all of your reviews, I am not going to today. But I will grab a few that I felt I should respond to! Check them out to see if I responded to yours!**

 _divergentlymuggleborn_

 _Pleas update soon, I really loved this story and I definitely want to read more!_

 **The reason I felt the need to respond to yours was because of how recent it was! Whether or not you were responding to my authors note or you just felt the need to write it, your review is what made me update today. Thank you for telling me that you love my story! It made my day! The fact that you were the only one to answer after my authors note makes me appreciate your response greatly! So thank you very much!**

 _Jojoboo90_

 _I like Damon. He sounds sexy! But he needs to get the hell away from Tris lol If Tobias catches him its sure to be a fight, which would be entertaining, A jealous Tobias fighting for his Tris would certainly be entertaining lol_

 _Ive read Into the Night. 10/10 :) love it._

 **Thank you for your constant reviews! Damon definitely is sexy! I'm using the vampire diaries character with some moderations! So look up a picture and when you read it, think of Damon salvator, just sexier. And yes, a jealous Tobias against Damon would be quite entertaining! I might just make that happen! We'll see! Isn't into the night great? If I'm being honest it is one of my favorite! Thanks again for the review!**

 _Snowingheart_

 _Okay, this is amazing. I want to cry really badly but I smile waaaay to much. This a hilarious story and I can't wait to hear more._

 **You have no idea how excited I am hearing that! The fact that my story is giving you multiple emotions is just so amazing! It's funny and confusing to me that something I'm writing can bring people such emotions! It just seems so weird that it could happen! But thank you for telling me that, it was a great confidence boost! Thanks for your review!**

 _Love the Brightest Star_

 _Ouch! Competition for Tobias? Damn...well I will be lying if I say I hate Damon, he sounds amazing (add the fact that I'm a Vampire Diaries fan too, so you know... Easy imagining) But what about Tobias? Can't wait for more!_

 **Ah! You recognized Damon! I'm so happy someone noticed that Damon is, in fact, a Vampire Diaries character! Your review made me laugh so much! Just the way you wrote it was hilarious to me! Thanks for the review and please keep them coming!**

 _paula'08_

 _I am happy for Chris... But please tell me this is going to be a FourTris story! I'd hate to see Tris with another man in the end. I don't mind a little angst, though. He seems like a nice guy, but I hope Tobias can make things right with Tris, though. She always walks in at the most inappropriate times. I was happy to see you had updated._

 **So I was planning on ending my answers to the reviews until I saw yours underneath the "Love the Brightest Star" review. I know how you always comment on my chapters and I just had to take a look! I hope it will be a Fourtris story. I planned for it to be. But as I write, I tend to change a lot of ideas that I originally would think out. So if I wind up falling in love with Damon, or someone else, then I can't make any promises as for what's to come! It's true! Tris does walk in at the worst times! But thats what makes a story, right? Maybe not! I wouldn't know :) Thank you for always being one of my first reviewers! I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it! Thank you for your review!**

 **Ok guys time to get to the next chapter!**

Tris

Walking the hallways seemed normal after a small amount of time. Meeting Damon put me in a great mood, so I was able just to enjoy just being with myself this early in the morning. I really liked it. Eventually, I lost track of time. I decided it would be better to just go to the dining hall. So now I'm on my way. I hope the food tastes good. My stomach starts to growl and I pick up my speed. Once I get to the doors, I realize that I am late.

Everyone is already at their tables eating. I walk through the doors and that's when I see Tobias. His eyes are looking directly into mine. They're mesmerizing. The blue spirals have me transfixed on his orbs. I can't look away. I try, and fail. The look he's giving me makes my chest want to close into itself. Butterflies flood into my stomach. I try to move but I'm frozen in place. A small, peaceful smile is on his face. He looks like he's in love.

"Tris!" A deep voice exclaims.

I turn my head over towards the sound, finally pulled out of my trance. Damon is approaching me with a large grin plastered on his face. It looks good on him.

"Hey Damon!" I respond.

"Tris! Want to come sit at my table today?"

I hesitate for a second and look over at my table. Everyone is talking happily. All except Tobias. He sits, slouched, with a frown on his face. His ears are red and he's glaring at his food like he wants to burn it. His one hand is holding his fork extremely tight. The other is practically bending the edge of the table. If he's angry about Damon, he needs to get over it. He has Lauren.

I shake my head. He doesn't care about who I talk to. He's with Lauren now. Maybe they just had a fight or something. He's probably just thinking it over in his head.

I turn back to Damon and agree to sitting with him whilst nodding happily. I tell him I'm going to get my food and then I'll come join them. As soon as I start walking, I think I feel Tobias's eyes following me. But why would he be staring at me? I must be imagining it.

I rush to grab my food and go over towards Damon.

"I'm so hungry." I state as I set down my tray.

"Makes sense, you were up really early this morning." He replies.

"True, but you were too."

"And I'm hungry as well."

"I can tell, almost all your food is gone." I giggle.

"Hey! I didn't eat it that fast!" He laughs.

"Sure." I remark sarcastically.

"So, I think you had something to tell me." He states.

"And what would that be?"

"Your long story that you mentioned earlier!" He answers, smirking.

"Oh. I don't know if I should tell you right now." I say back.

"Why not?"

"It's just not very cheerful." I shrug my shoulders.

"Well if you want to tell me, you can." He whispers kindly.

"Maybe later, Damon."

"Okay. So how about those pancakes? Pretty good, right?" He changes the subject quickly and I'm grateful for that.

We continue on our conversation by talking about light and funny topics. He's very entertaining. I slowly come to realize that I would date Damon. He's funny, friendly, nice, attractive, and sociable. All of those qualities are perfect for me. He's almost the exact opposite of Tobias.

After I finish eating, Damon suggests that we wander the halls and explore a bit around dauntless. We start to walk down many different hallways. I give him a tour around areas he's never seen and we joke around the entire time we walk. At one point Damon decides to act like a tour guide, even though I'm pretty much showing him around.

We get to the chasm and I remember Tobias's secret place. I want to tell Damon about it so badly, but I avoid it. I couldn't imagine the betrayal Tobias would feel. I know Shauna told me he's already hurting, but telling someone else about someone's secrets is taking it too far.

We sit along the edge and dangle our feet over the dangerous drop.

"So you lived here before right?"

"Yeah. I was actually an initiate."

"Really?" He questions.

"Yeah." I mumble as I daze off, thinking about how long ago that was.

"Tell me about it."

"It was rough. Extremely rough. These people were insane when I compared it to my Abnegation home. But I loved some of it. The thrill of the zip line, my friends, the knife throwing, the fact that it made me stronger, and I also was able to meet someone here." I sighed thinking about my past.

"You were from abnegation?"

"Yeah I was."

"Why'd you come here?"

"I didn't know where to go. I always thought you went chose based on your test results, but I couldn't."

"Why?" He asks.

"My results were inconclusive." I reply hesitantly. Now being a divergent doesn't matter as much, or at least that's what Christina told me.

"Isn't that like really rare?"

"Yeah." I respond quietly.

"What were your results?"

"Abnegation, erudite, and dauntless." I say shortly. This conversation makes me uncomfortable.

"I've only ever heard of one person who got three results."

"Who?"

"A girl named Beatrice Prior. Apparently she died a few years ago. But everyone still talks about her. Risked her life so we could live like this. Insane right?" He tells me.

I can't figure out how to respond to that. Do I tell him? What do I do?

I don't have time to reply to him because soon enough were interrupted.

"She is Beatrice Prior."

I know that voice. I could recognize it any where in the entire world. I could hear him in a crowd of a thousand people. The man who haunts my dreams and memories: Tobias.

I turn my head and see him casually leaning against the wall like he'd been there the entire time. He stares straight at me.

"What, Four?" Damon asks.

"The girl, sitting right next to you, is Beatrice Prior." He states while looking directly at me.

I turn away from him and stare at my feet. I finally turn over to Damon when I still don't hear him respond.

Damon is staring at me with a look of confusion.

"Tris is Beatrice Prior. The girl in front of you sacrificed her life for dauntless. She is brave, intelligent, kind, and selfless. Tris gave up her life so her brother, who betrayed her, could survive. She was shot three times but made a worldwide impact. Tris still managed to complete her mission." Tobias continued.

Damon's staring at me in awe and I have no idea how to react. Tobias just described me as if I was the most important person in the entire world. He acts like we're still together, like he's proud of his girlfriend.

The only problem is I'm not his girlfriend.

"How's she here if she died?" Damon directs his question towards Tobias.

"I would love to know." He answers.

They both look at me expectantly.

I turn my head towards Tobias, then back to Damon. Then to Tobias, then back to Damon. The cycle continues as I try to think of what to say.

"I did die, but not for long. That's all you need to know." I mumble.

I quickly get up and rush away from the both of them. I hear footsteps behind me. I have no doubt that it's Tobias. He's faster than me. He will catch me. He has before. I turn around, ready to take whatever he has to say, but instead I received something I never expected.

His body is a few feet away from mine, and within two steps, he closes the gap between us. His hands reach up and lightly trace my jaw. My face involuntarily leans into his palms. My eyes flutter shut and I let out a sigh that built up in my lungs. He removes one hand from my face to touch my waist. With a quick movement, by body is tight against his. His hand is flat against my back, holding me to him. He caresses my cheek once more before attaching his lips to mine. I moan into his mouth and push my lips hard against his. His lips are so much softer than I remember. I used to dream about this when I was at the bureau. But everything's so much better here and now. My senses are heightened and his touch sends a chill down my body. My heart is pushing against my chest. My eyes are squeezed shut. He kisses me harder and moves us to the wall. Within a second, he lifts my body up and keeps me against the wall. Every move has a renewed passion to it. He slightly shifts his hand and that's when my eyes fly open. He continues to kiss me but I realize that he has Lauren. How could I let this happen? After I tried so hard to stay away?

I maneuver my body so I can get down from the wall. He stops kissing me and his eyes reveal everything he's feeling. They look pained and hurt. But they are also glassed over with lust. I slowly push myself away from him and hope that the shock of me leaving will give me a good head start. My feet start to leave, but my heart is back with Tobias. If I truly allowed my heart to control me, I'd still be back with Tobias. But he has a girlfriend. So now I'm the one who has to leave, because I know he won't. Leaving him is the best thing to do. Right? ...It's for the best. He has Lauren, I will have Damon. This can't happen again. Right..?

 **I may be a little rusty with writing since I haven't written a new chapter in a while, but tell me what you think! So are you guys FourTris or Tramon? (should that be their name) If you have a better name please review because I may be using it more often! Thanks! Hope you enjoyed it!**


	16. Chapter 16

**I'mmmm backkkk and you're gonna want to read this chapter! I'm sorry I haven't updated in FOREVER but summer's got me really busy! I hope no one was waiting on my update for too long. I wanted to thank every single one of you for your reviews! They are the reason I write Allegiant from Black and White! I hope you enjoy my update and PLEASE keep up the reviews! Love you all! Ok, get ready for chapter 16!**

 _ **Tobias**_

 _Thundering stomps echo down the hall. My pace quickens with each step. I can hear breath coming out of my mouth and it is all too fast. If only I had caught her sooner, then I wouldn't be in this predicament. A corner comes up unexpectedly fast. I barely make the turn, almost slipping in the process. I call out her name mid-sprint. My chest burns from running at this speed. The chasm finally comes into my sight. I push harder and harder. She's right in front of me. Her blonde hair dangles over the railing and her hands grip it tightly. Her eyes search the rushing water, in hope of an escape. As if she's in slow motion, she maneuvers her body over the metal bar. I need to save her. I sprint faster than I ever have in my entire life, past the point of exhaustion. I watch as her grip slowly loosens. Her face shows no fear, in fact, it reveals no emotion whatsoever. She will fall to her death, but she isn't afraid. Her body tilts forwards and her fingers release the rail. Nothing else but her matters, I know that now, so I jump. But I'm too late._

 _Her hair flies forward and her body is jolted back. I examine the arms wrapped around her torso. Strong and large. The arms that saved her life. But they aren't mine. I pull my body up from where it landed: on the metal bar. I only recognize the pain from the impact now because I was too focused on her earlier. I enclose my forearms around my ribs, as an attempt to ease the ache. Then I look up to see her savior, her hero, and my body lurches forward at the sight of him. Damon._

I open my eyes, completely relieved to see the fear landscaping room. _It was just a simulation._ My heart rate is moving at an unstoppable speed _._ I ease my way out of the chair and place the needle back into its rightful spot.

I still have four fears. The first three are the same but the last changed. Marcus no longer occupies my thoughts. Now it's Tris, but not only her, also Damon. I fear Damon taking her from me. I fear that she will find love without me. I'm afraid that she will abandon me.

I hurriedly make my way to my apartment. I have been in that room for far too long and the stars are a large sign of that.

Once I arrive home, I head straight to bed. I can only hope that I won't dream.

…

The next morning I wake up thirty minutes late. I shove my quilt away from my body. I move quickly as an attempt to make up the time I lost. Tris haunts my mind. I shake my head and rush out the door. I can't lose myself thinking about someone I will never have.

I push hard on the heavy doors leading to the dining all. Apparently too hard, because the doors slam as I enter the room. Everyone turns their heads to me but the only pair of eyes I can focus on are hers. She turns away quickly, most likely regretting our kiss from yesterday. I cast my eyes to the floor. I can't bear to look at her any longer, not with the simulation from last night running through my mind.

I move robotically as I eat. People try to make conversation with me, but I ignore them. I only focus on the tray in front of me.

Maybe she never loved me. Maybe that's why she avoids me. What did I do wrong? Sure, we had our arguments, but doesn't every couple?

I can't help but contemplate this. It's not like she confronted me about anything.

All my thoughts are interrupted when I hear a gasp escape Shauna's mouth. I flip my head to her. Then I follow her eyes to see my worst nightmare taking action. Damon is kissing Tris.

Red suddenly clouds my vision. I stand and feel hands grab at me. I shake them off. Damon kissed Tris. Damon kissed my Tris. If only he knew what was to come after. I almost feel bad that he doesn't know about my love for her. _Almost_. I can't feel my body as I charge at him. All I feel is the satisfaction of my fist colliding with his jaw. I attack him with every ounce of energy in me. He tries to block me but I am running off of pure rage. Punches and kicks smash him repetitively leaving marks everywhere. Bodies reach out to stop me, but they are too late. I pile all of my energy into my last hit. I cock my arm into position and release my fist with an impeccable amount of speed. The damage is done. He didn't stand a chance against me. People are screaming and I see one lift Damon's unconscious body off the ground. I. Don't. Care. Zeke yells in my face. I barely notice. I can't bring myself back to reality.

"What the hell, Tobias!" I turn my head towards her voice.

"Do you think you can just attack anyone I'm involved with?" Tris continues to scream.

"If I ever had that mentality, Lauren would be dead, you dick!" She shrieks into my face.

I tilt my head. Why is she talking about Lauren?

"Don't act like I don't know! I'm not stupid, remember?" She shoves my shoulders angrily.

I can't find anything to say. She thought I was with Lauren. She ignored me out of respect, not hatred. Tris still cares for me.

A stupid, lopsided grin finds its way to my face.

"What the hell are you smirking about?" Tris screeches.

"I love you." I whisper.

In an instant, her face softens. I take both of her rosy cheeks in my hands and smash my lips into hers. An insane burn assaults my stomach and I truly smile into our kiss. I feel her grin too, and I know I'm holding the whole world in the palms of my hands. And everything is perfect.

 **Ahhhh what do you think? Fourtris is finally happening! Review if you liked this chapter!**


	17. Chapter 17

**So I know it's been a while… sorry for the lack of updates. I've been extremely busy! But a new chapter is here and I can't wait to see your responses! Today I was thinking about Christmas and I'm so excited for it to come! Anyone else? My Christmas thoughts put me in a really good mood and I decided to type a new chapter so here's chapter 17!**

 _Tris_

"Tobias!" I shriek and smack my fists against his back. I giggle loudly whilst telling him to stop, but we both know I don't really mean it. He has me thrown over his shoulder upside-down and is currently sprinting through the long, green grass. We agreed to spend the day together. Our time first started with a picnic near the old amity compound, but then escalated to a game of tag. He was "it" first and then eventually tug me, which lead to the chasing position alternating between the two of us. Then, once I tug him back for the fourth time, he charged at me like a bull and threw me over his shoulder, leading our game to where it is now. Though it seems so childish, I can't possibly say I've had more fun in years. Today feels like a dream, and I want it to last as long as possible.

"Put me down!" I playfully demand.

"Only if you say please." He grins cheekily.

I roll my eyes overdramatically and mumble a please.

"Well since you asked so nicely…" He paused and then dropped me to the ground.

"Four!" I yell.

He shrugs his shoulders and displays an innocent smile.

"I didn't say to drop me!" I giggle whilst attempting to seem angry.

"You didn't say not to, either." He remarks.

"You're so difficult." I smile lightly, causing an end to our little banter.

"So where've you been, Tris?" He asks, suddenly growing serious.

"Ya know… around." I try to keep the conversation light.

"You were around but didn't think to tell me that you are alive?" He raises his eyebrows.

"Not now, Tobias." I push away the question.

"Well you knew this would come around sometime, might as well get it over with." 

"Are you kidding me? I literally just started talking to you again 3 days ago and you're already going to interrogate me?"

"Tris you were gone for so many years, it seemed like I was starting to forget you. Then, when I found out that you were actually alive all this time, one can only assume that you may have been avoiding-" He pauses and shakes his head.

He's never been good with revealing his emotions.

I understand what Tobias is trying to say. He doesn't know that I was held against my will. If I was in his place I'd conclude he didn't want to be with me anymore. If he was gone so long, faking his death, I would immediately infer that he did such a thing to escape me.

"Tobias, if I could've gotten to you sooner I would've. I just… couldn't." I respond.

"What do you mean?"

"I wasn't willingly staying away." I state.

"Someone locked you up?" Tobias asks with an icy look in his eyes.

"Yes." I whisper.

His back stiffens in alarm. Tobias's fists clench. I lightly place my hand on his bicep.

"What did they do to you?" He asks quietly.

"Nothing I couldn't handle." I try my hardest to make the situation more relaxed, but it's difficult once he's on edge.

"Such as…" He stops, expecting me to elaborate.

"Such as nothing, Four. I'm here now and you need to realize that." I almost chastise him for asking.

I know he wants to protect me but this is something I don't really want to reveal too many people. The more I talk about it, the more real it seems. I don't want the last few years of my life to be real.

"You weren't here for years, Tris! You left me here whether or not you meant to. All I could live with is regret! Oh, and not to mention that time took forever to pass because it hurt so much! So forgive me if I just wanted to know what happened to you when you were supposedly dead!" He shouts.

"Well I'm sure those past years lasted so long for you!" I exaggerate the 'so'.

"When you think your girlfriend's dead time does pass pretty slowly, Beatrice!" He continues to anger me.

"Am I supposed to pity you? Is that what you want? Because while I was 'dead', I was actually being tortured; physically and mentally! So excuse me if I don't cry for you over your 'loss'." I counter.

After my reaction, I push my body off the ground in rough haste. I walk with almost a stomp in my step towards the train. I can hear him behind me. I think he knows better than to talk.

The train moves quickly towards us. Like the old dauntless tradition, we jump onto the wooden floor. The only difference is that I get inside the train car first.

The entire ride home is silent. I appreciate it. When I yelled at him I wasn't trying to aim his sympathy towards me. In fact, I have no idea where the outburst came from, I just tend to have many these days.

We arrive at the compound and still haven't talked. It isn't until we get off the train that he talks to me. All he asks is if I want to go to his apartment, to which I agree.

We walk awkwardly, side by side, through the hallways. His footsteps quicken when he sees his door and mine slow. We will have talk sooner than later, and I have a feeling the moment we step into the apartment something will be coming. He unlocks his door with a key pulled from his pocket. I follow his figure slowly through the door and tilt my head to the floor. Avoiding eye contact seems like a good idea at the moment.

I see his physique move in my peripheral vision and slightly flinch. I think he recognizes my reaction. Tobias comes behind me and wraps his warm arms around my waist, which sends chills down my spine.

"Tris." He whispers into my ear. "I love you, no matter what."

I place my hands on top of his in reassurance. He squeezes my body a little bit tighter and I turn to face him.

"I love you too, Tobias." I kiss him on the cheek and feel a warm smile through his features.

"We should probably get some rest." He speaks lightly.

"Mhm." I mumble but snuggle deeper into his arms.

We stand together for what seems like forever, until sleep finally grasps me.


	18. Chapter 18

**I know I haven't updated for a long time & I'm sorry guys! It's probably really hard for you to want to keep on reading when I never keep up with the story. So I decided to update but I can't promise any new updates for a while because I'm pretty busy but I'll try my best! Enjoy chapter 18! **

**_Tris_**

Today Tobias planned something. I'm not sure what it is, all that he told me was that he had a surprise in store. I've been so excited all day that I can barely stand the wait. The only time we've gone out together since I came back was about a week ago, and we just wound up arguing. So I feel like whatever he has planned will be a good break from reality, and hopefully it'll just be relaxing.

I miss seeing him without arguing. I also miss the way our relationship was when we first met: innocent, passionate, and fun. Everything just feels different from the way we used to be. Maybe it's because of how much we've changed over time.

I'm really hoping this surprise will bring back some of our old flame.

Maybe it will, maybe it won't. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

A few minutes pass and I decide that sitting alone with my thoughts will lead to no good, so I make a decision to go to the training room.

Once I arrive, I first wrap my knuckles with tape. Then, I go to a punching bag, the same one that I first used in initiation. I swing hard at the bag. A pattern of thuds resound, almost rhythmically, as my fists make contact with the bag. The sack shakes with every rap of my hands. I understand why Tobias always does this, it's quite relieving.

Once I finish with the punching bag, I move to the targets on the other side of the room. I reach for three knifes, each the same shape and weight as the other, and toss one at a time. I hit the center of the target each time. I was always told knife throwing was my strong suit, and I guess I'd have to agree.

Lastly, I lift a gun from the side table and allow it to rest in my palms. This small item is more powerful than the impact any man's fist, even Tobias's. I shoot a few rounds before deciding to stop. Tobias will be ready to leave soon. I rush home and hop in the shower.

I finish my shower just in time, because as soon as I get out, I hear our apartment door open.

"Tris!" Tobias calls.

"Yeah?" I respond.

"You ready?"

"I just need a few more minutes then we can go." I tell him and start to dry off my hair.

"Okay." 

I hear the bed creak and know that he is waiting for me right outside the bathroom.

"Hey! Should I be dressing up at all?" I yelled out to him.

"No. You'll be fine wearing whatever you want." He responds.

I pull on some pants and a long-sleeved top. I walk out the bathroom and he stands up to greet me.

He opens his arms to me and I nuzzle into them. They wrap around my body completely, filling me with warmth.

"Hi." I say quietly.

"Hi." He whispers into my hair.

I pull my body tighter to his. If only we could stay like this forever...

Tobias suddenly pulls away and grips onto my hand. He starts to drag me like a young child pulling their mother. I chuckle lightly and follow him out the door. A few minutes later we arrive at the train tracks. We hurry to get in and once we get inside, I slide down the wall to the ground. Tobias follows me.

"So, will you give me a hint as to where we are going?" I question with a playful smile.

"Never." He says, stubbornly crossing his arms over his chest.

I beg him jokingly to tell me and he doesn't relent, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

Finally we arrive. I hop out of the train, my hand in his, and look at the scenery around me. The sun is just starting to set. An array of reds and oranges paint the sky, with an occasional tint of pink peeking through. But the sunset isn't what surprises me. In front of me sits Navy Pier, still old and empty, but beautiful under the colors.

Tobias leads me towards the best part of all of this: the ferris wheel.

The steel frame stands tall against the skyline making the perfect picture.

I turn over to him with a huge smile overcoming my face.

"Thank you!" I hurry over to him and hug him passionately.

He chuckles lightly and hugs me back.

"Can we go on it?" I ask him whilst gazing at the ferris wheel, my arms still tight around him.

"Sure. I made sure that it worked earlier today." He answers.

I grin and drag him towards it, full force. We get to the ferris wheel and I hop into the cart closest to the ground.

"How are we going to get it to start?" I question, suddenly perplexed with the idea of getting it moving with only Tobias and I here.

"Zeke!" He shouts.

I look around over to where Tobias is looking and see Zeke come around.

"Hey Zeke!" I wave over exaggeratedly.

"Hey guys! You ready?" He exclaims.

"You know it!"

Zeke starts up the ferris wheel and it slowly kicks into action. I call out for Tobias to hurry, and soon enough, he's right next to me. My hands hitch to the somewhat rusted railing in anticipation. Tobias slowly releases one of my hands from its hold on the bar then intertwines his fingers within mine. I look up at him and see a grin on his face.

I laugh a little as the cart raises from the ground. The wind blows lightly into my face as the speed increases and Zeke barely becomes a speck as we reach the top. I look up from the ground and see the sunset. It feels as if we could touch the sky at any moment. I sigh contently and look over to Tobias. His right hand is clenching onto the bar with his arm stiffly straight. I forgot all about his fear of heights.

"Hey." I whisper and turn his head to face me. "You got this." I encourage with a smirk.

"I have ever since the first time I climbed up here behind you." He looks directly into my eyes, his blue eyes entrancing me.

He leans in and presses his lips to mine. They softly rub against my plump red pair, staying open the entire time. I react to him by pushing back onto his mouth. Our exchanges become more frequent and soon our lips stay attached.

I've never felt better in my entire life. Something deep inside me stirs, something that hasn't been awoken in years. We kiss more fervently with passion driving every action. He places his hands along my jaw. Time passes and his fingers find their way in my hair. My hands crawl along his back, tracing every present muscle.

He then slowly pulls his mouth from mine and our breathing starts to slow. Tobias rests his forehead against mine gingerly. He pecks my mouth once more then pulls away completely. He tilts his head towards the sky and I follow his eyes. I inhale deeply at what I see. A dark blanket lays above our little world, sprinkled with sparkling designs. Among these patterns is a single white sphere that shines brighter than the lights shining from the city. It's face smiles down on us.

"Wow." I release breathlessly.

He squeezes my hand in response.

"Thank you for tonight. I loved it." I speak after minutes of silence spent admiring the nighttime sky.

"I'd do anything for the woman I love." He smiles warmly at me.

"Anything?" I ask mischievously

He pauses for a second, rethinking what he just said.

"Within reason."

I chuckle lightly and snuggle my head into his shoulder.

"I love you, Tobias Eaton."

"There has never been a moment that has made that name sound better than right now."

He holds onto me tightly for what seems like eternity, but it also feel like no time has passed at all.


	19. Chapter 19

Okay so as I said earlier, I'm keeping up with the story. Might as well get back into it and hope for the best! Thanks for the reviews from earlier and I hope to hear them again after chapter 19. Okay, enjoy and please comment any ideas or critiques!

Tris

A few weeks have passed, each peppered with romantic dates and fun hangouts. At first, Tobias only offered to take me out alone, but as time passed, he started organizing group dates for the fun of it. Who knew the dauntless prodigy could be such a romantic?

Today, Tobias and I agreed to go paint-balling at the Navy Pier along with Christina, Luke, Zeke, Shauna, and a few other people that I don't know too well. They all wanted to relive a memory of the live that we knew before, one that made us feel young and unstoppable.

We arrived by train, split up in two groups of four. Everyone agreed that Tobias and I were team captains, meaning we were going to be against each other, and I planned to win. My team strategically placed the flag on a seat of the old swing ride, so it was hidden by the chair, and planned how to go about winning. Like last time, we split up and went to get the flag. Shauna and I went on our way to find where it was hidden.

We searched their area for a long time, but could not find any sign of their team or the flag.

The ground crackled underneath our boots with every step we took. We slowed our pace to soften the sound and continued moving.

"I can't see anything." Shauna whispers to me.

I turn my head up to the sky and struggle to make out a single star. It definitely makes this game more interesting.

"I can't either. Just keep quiet and listen for any noises." I quietly respond.

Shauna nods in agreement.

It takes a while for my eyes to adjust to the darkness, but once they do, I can make out dark figures of trees.

A gust of wind blows that almost knocks me over. I steady myself and look at Shauna. Her eyes are wide. She seems like she's looking for something. I follow her line of sight to a group of trees, but see nothing.

"Shauna?" I whisper.

She lashes her head to the side. With lightning speed, Shauna closes her hand onto my mouth and slowly points her finger to where her eyes were looking earlier.

I look again, yet see nothing. I stare for what feels like hours until my eyes finally focus in, and see a figure. Rarely does it move, but it does resemble a human figure. They're here. But can they see us?

If they knew we were here, they would've shot. So how do we go about this without being seen?

We could move to the side and come up from behind them, but we could be seen. All we'd have to do is get behind the trees to our left. Or we could shoot from here, and risk alerting another team member if there is more than one.

I don't have time to think like this. We could be seen. I raise my pointer finger towards the left to make Shauna aware and slowly move towards the trees. She nods her head and follows.

We hear the leaves rustle and I'm sure that they've seen us, so I move faster. Soon enough, something flies past my ear, making a zing.

I bolt to the tree which is about three yards ahead of us. Behind me, I hear Shauna's boots smacking the rubble. I get there fast without being touched by the paint and push my body against the rough bark. But I don't hear any more running behind me. I turn back for Shauna but see that she's stopped.

She nods for me to continue, so I do.

I quickly approach from behind the person. It's Luke. He's not nearly as experienced as us, so he won't expect me. I raise my gun and take one shot, marking his heart. One down, three to go.

I move through the trees until I get back to gravel. I hear footsteps crunching against them and move in. Surprisingly, Chris is walking alone. I debate whether or not to shoot and decide to just do it quickly.

I place my finger on the trigger, take a deep breath, and press the trigger as I release the air through my mouth. The paint splatters across her vest and she lets out a scream.

Her eyes bulge and she whips her head towards me, completely caught off guard. She looks more than surprised. She looks terrified.

I hesitate before calling out to her.

"Christina?"

Her breathing heavy and her hands clenching, she whispers my name back.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

She nods her head but doesn't actually seem like it.

"What's wrong?"

Christina takes a deep breath before answering.

"Just..." She pauses to catch her breath," I guess I still have some nerves from the war."

I know it's been a while, but I can see why. Things like this haunt us, big or small.

I simply pull her in for a hug, and after a minute or two she shakes it off and leaves, trying not to let her pride get hurt any further.

I move on, a bit unfocused from the situation. There's no noise. Where could they be?

I'm not sure how this will play out, seeing as Tobias and I are almost always on the same team.

Finally, I do see Tobias, but a second after he notices me too. I lift my eyebrows at him and he winks back. Behind him, I see the flag.

"Don't think I'll let you win, Beatrice." He taunts.

"Don't think that this will be easy, Four." My lips quirk up into a hidden smile.

We both raise our guns, but I take cover behind a small box. I rapidly shoot at his body, but he was as fast as I was when finding cover.

We shuffle around, trying to shoot whilst avoiding the paint flying by our ears. We continually volley shots back and forth. Finally, I decide enough is enough. I jump over top of my box and use the high angle to aim at him. Sadly, he is always ready.

Tobias shifts as I shoot and reflexively jerks his gun into the air and presses the trigger. I try to dodge, but he was too fast. I feel the harsh impact of the paint ball and know I've lost.

Tobias grins sheepishly and comes over to me.

"You suck." I fake a pout then laugh.

"You love it." He chuckles and wraps his arms around me.

Tobias places a light kiss on my forehead and I grin at him.

We hear shouting and both become alert. Waiting as the noise comes closer, I recognize them as cheers.

"Well, someone found our flag." I deadpan.

"Yep. That's Zeke. No one has a higher pitched scream than him." He laughs.

Sure enough, Zeke comes sprinting over to Tobias, dangling the flag in his hand.

"Hell yeah!" Tobias shouts at him and Zeke pumps his fist in the air.

I giggle at their interaction and sigh contentedly. This is what dauntless should've been. This is what I wanted.

Twenty minutes later, we're back on the train. We all laugh about the occurrences of tonight and I feel an arm wrap around my waist. I know who it is immediately. I let him drag me until I'm again his chest. Everyone's conversation continues and I just listen to the stories being told from years ago. Ones from initiation. Will floats into the back of my mind. An overwhelming hope swells within me. I know what I'm wishing in the depths of my mind. I pray that not only he, but also my parents, and Uriah, are living just as I am. I know they're not, but miracles can happen.

Slowly, these thoughts dissipate and I let the steady thump of Tobias's heartbeat calm me. I focus back onto our group and feel their laughs lift my spirit. Me in Tobias's arms, laughing along with our friends, listening to crazy experiences from the past; this is what happy looks like.

Finally, we arrive back to the compound with bright smiles. We all hop off the train and enter the complex.

Chris is smiling, holding Luke's hand. Zeke has his arm over Shauna with a cheesy grin on his face and eyes only for her. Tobias has his hand wrapped around my torso, and the others are racing on each-other's backs. This is how we walk down the hallway.

I see Tori and raise my hand in the air carelessly, an attempted wave. She gives a small grin, not meaning it at all and my carefree mood drops. I walk away from Four and make my way to her.

"What's wrong?" I question.

"It's too soon." She mumbles.

"What is?" I suddenly grow concerned.

"You- you just came back." She stumbles on her words.

"And I'm staying. What are you talking about?"

"He said he's coming. He's bringing war to us. Says we'll regret ever leaving." She lets out after many breaths.

"Who? Who said this?"

I prepare myself, for I know what's coming before she speaks a word.

"David." She whispers.

Five seconds, that's all I should have to calm down.

Five.

Deep breath.

Four.

Hold in.

Three.

Release.

Two.

I can't.

One.

This isn't happening. 


End file.
